Jeremy Smith

Cake! Pop music! Chocolate! Sweden! Overemphatic punctuation!

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@auspost Thank you for employing posties who really care.

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@Reviewthe1 Excellent! Thanks very much.

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@Reviewthe1 Are you able to find out from your friend which building this is in so that this can be reported? Thanks!

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@ToTheMaxStirk In her defence, they did play her song.

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

Justifiable reason for me to leave Australia found at last:

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@hoopercarwyn *Spews*

I think NOT! It wasn't me who took my favourite tempting treat off the buffet.

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@hoopercarwyn ... New dish required to satisfy cravings. Please send alternative menu options. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@hoopercarwyn BREAKING CULINARY NEWS! Strawberries and cream is OFF the menu. I repeat, Strawberries and cream is OFF the menu.

[Max @Max_Shelton93]

I'd like to thank @lorealmenexpert Post-Shave Balm for letting me know what it feels like to be shot in the face by a cannon full of pain.

[Dave Callan @davecallantwit]

You should be able to sue click bait if you do believe what happens next

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@becjlee @deborahbowman Dr Lee... it just rolls off the tongue innit.

CONGRATULATIONS, Dr Bectastic!! xxxxx

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

Well at least I live in Australia now, and not under some hideously conservative government.

... D'OH!!!

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@deborahbowman It's certainly a wonderful time to be alive.

[James Davies @JamesDavies75]

I'd say this exit poll has made me feel sick but looks like I won't be able to afford to be sick for at least another 5 years #GE2015

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

So perhaps the way one eats a bacon sandwich does matter after all #GE2015

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@scriptpencil Gosh darn it... the face didn't appear to work! Woe is us.

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@scriptpencil And that's a face one doesn't disagree with.

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@HannahPopsy Och, aye lassie! And, naturally, it looks bonnie with Bubbles.

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@hoopercarwyn EEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!! *has nightmares for weeks*

[Jeremy Smith @JezzaBSmith]

@HannahPopsy Nice work! (From The Boy too, of course)