.@PostMalone My two best friends are getting married and want you to come but are too nervous to ask. As best man, how many retweets does this post need to get for you to come?
@EeSuchin hi there! I’m not even sure if you still use this account but I read your book and really enjoyed it. I’m building a slightly complicated landscape using bonsai and was wondering if I might pick your brain about a few things?
@_luckychalms I haven’t had the Twitter app installed in months and it won’t let me read what tweet you’re replying to but I hope you found out if Mel is dead or not (I asked her a medical question yesterday and she condescendingly told me I wasn’t dying so she’s alive for sure)
PROS & CONS OF GOING SWIMMING
PROS
-Refreshing
-Good exercise
-May discover lost city of Atlantis
CONS
-A lady might see the athletic physique I've honed from my karate training & demand to marry me, which could distract me from my karate career
CONCLUSION: Not worth the risk
Sexy texting is the greatest danger facing us as a society today. Someone could even be trying to do sexy texting with you right now. Here are the signs you need to look out for