Michael Haynes

Coffee machine at @starbucks

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

@_hotlana

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

@_hotlana I don’t know mine 😩

[Dave Itzkoff @ditzkoff]

may divorce be with you

[DrinkingTicket ® @DrinkingTicket]

Breaking: City of Columbia declares a state of emergency. All businesses in City must now operate at no more than 50% of their legal capacity and must restrict parties of more than 6 and space out tables. Full order linked in this tweet.

Link: https://t.co/7USeSS7D9P

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

@sdlonyeranala @BalloonMerchant @BalloonMerchant is the boyfriend we all deserve.

[Kirky @jordan_kirk]

Me. Every. Time. 😔

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

@PabstBlueRibbon now what?

[Robert Mays @robertmays]

This is all I can think about right now.

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

@BalloonMerchant Woah. Has it really been that long?

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

@BalloonMerchant Said, “Venti Java Chip Frapp for Captain America”

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

This aged well.

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

Happy 4th half birthday to me.

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

@GapMiatas I see me!

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

@AnchorLyss @tiger101ish OMG. I saw the sketch on IG and thought it was Jacksob 😂

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

So, this is 30.

I started this year by visiting best friends (englikethelang & cousins_tattoos) in Nashville and slaying the dragon on the way home. I wasn’t particularly looking forward… https://t.co/Po2Idji2kG

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

30 😪

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

I’m almost certain I’m the reason there’s a speed bump on my street now...

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

Me: Singing along with John Legend at work

Partner I’m working with: Wow, that’s even better than John Legend

Me: Ha, yeah I wish I was that talented

Partner: Well, there’s always auto tune

Me: 😒😭

[Michael Haynes @JMichaelHaynes]

I really never believed I would see it. Especially not more than once. #ALLIN