Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179

They threw rocks at Jesus

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

@StromboliSavant #NotMyShooter

[Gabby Jones @GabbyJo37984765]

What’s the deal with gay people???

Knock it off!!

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

LADIES: please make sure to check in with your finance bros today… it’s going to be a tough next 4 years if you have IB / PE in your Hinge bio

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

@StromboliSavant

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

Blessed with a twink face, cursed with twink legs

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

Keeping all the girls on my roster apart from each other at the function to prevent syncing

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

Can you really be gay forever

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

Each episode of Entourage that a girl has watched is 5 bodies

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

Last night we let the women talk (never again)

[Mr. MakeItHappen @StromboliSavant]

Sir, a second Busch Light has crossed the blood-brain barrier:

[Mr. MakeItHappen @StromboliSavant]

Executing a “No knock warrant” on my wife’s pussy tonight

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

@StromboliSavant This is one of your best

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

@StromboliSavant Nice to know I’m only one degree of separation from Chris Hansen

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

@StromboliSavant Lil Huddy meal had me downloading Grindr

[HowlingMutant @Howlingmutant0]

🚩s in women: 🚩Has a dog
🚩Has an alarm system
🚩Complicated locking mechanism on back door
🚩Motion sensors around perimeter of house

[ppigg @s4m31p4n]

That look your cousin gives you when you’re 10 minutes into cousin and chill

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

I am being told by multiple sources that I need to download Tinder

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

Hinge needs a filter for girls with zero self esteem

[Jonathan Connecticut 6’7” IQ 179 @JohnConnecticut]

I have been hemorrhaging instagram followers lately

And for that I will be killing myself