John Candy

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

@cals_own @SecretDiner1 @MarinaOLoughlin @AAHospitality @GoodFoodGuideUK @HardensBites @MichelinGuideUK That looks ace 👍🏻 making me hungry.
Vindaloo doesn’t mean pork in vinegar though, it is the Indian name for the Portuguese dish
Carne de vinha d'alhos which means meat with wine and garlic.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

@syandjill @domdyer70 Perhaps do your own research or verify the photos are genuine before sharing with impressionable kids. I suggest reading about the basal melt rate of ice sheets or the earth’s axial tilt and how at the current eccentricity of .017, the Earth is 5 million kilometers closer to Sun.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

My new year’s resolution is to be more spontaneous.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

@KickAssCantona2 @RossKemp6 Looks like my mate Marv from Home Alone.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Sometimes I sit on my arm until it goes numb, then make myself a sandwich. It makes it feel like someone else is doing it.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Do you ever see an opinion that’s so terrible that you actually feel bad for that person’s brain?

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

I went to the doctor with hearing problems.

He said "Can you describe the symptoms?"

I said "Homer is a fat bloke and Marge has blue hair"

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Pound for pound I'm the best fighter in this Yankee Candle shop.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

22 years today.

[shamandeities @ShamanDeities]

Paranormal Private Investigator skills are what the soul of Mr. Candy pointed out VIBRATIONALLY during the #oscars

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

I just witnessed someone order a double decaf espresso, what's the point in that?

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Don't drive whilst eating pastries.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Just found out Glory Holes have nothing to do with Christianity.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

If your Super Bowl party doesn't have an elastic waistband dress code I shan't be attending.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Why do I have to pick my kids up if they have school again tomorrow?

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Some kids live in war zones and I can't even find the courage to answer a phone call with a private number.

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Is that a thesaurus in your pocket or are you just cheerful, delighted, and overjoyed to see me?

[John Candy @JohneyeCandy]

Never leave me alone with groupon, I've just bought a cupcake decorating class and a Mexican hat that doubles as a nacho plate.