Jonah

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

Things growth people say “yeah totally” to while opening a new tab:

- multi-touch attribution
- incrementality
- channel payback
- self-reported attribution
- blended CAC
- conversion lift
- pipeline velocity
- what “rev rec” means
- why finance is mad

What am I missing?

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

- an AI outbound workflow that saved the team 10 hours and cost legal a full afternoon

- a founder in your DMs asking if their whole GTM motion can be agentic

- 542 e-com brands in the pipeline that crossed nexus before your first call

I don’t make the rules.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

By 30 you should have:

- an AI tool stack expensive enough to concern finance

- 1 Clay table doing things that would be impossible to explain to a normal person

- 2 CRM fields that are both technically wrong but too politically sensitive to delete

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

I love when a CRM says a deal was sourced by “Website.”

Incredible detail.

Might as well say the lead came from “Internet.”

Or “Computer.”

Or “Person used browser.”

Thank you, modern attribution.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

Corporate speak I’m trying to remove from my life:

1. Circle back
2. Double-click
3. Create alignment
4. Move the needle
5. Unlock value
6. Drive outcomes
7. Socialize internally
8. Let’s take this offline

What’d I miss?

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

Technically true. Completely misses what actually happened.

This is why "how did you hear about us?" is still one of the best questions you can ask. On the form. On the sales call. During onboarding.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

"Who are you using for this?" probably drives a stupid amount of B2B pipeline.

Someone asks it in a Slack group. A name gets dropped. Someone else says "yeah, we use them." An old post gets forwarded internally.

A week later, someone books a demo. CRM says direct traffic.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

POV: you told yourself tonight’s gonna be a good night with HubSpot

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

If you see this Loel, congratulations on the seed round.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

I saw a founder at a coffee shop spending 23 minutes explaining his startup to an investor.

From what I could gather, the company:

- uses AI
- helps teams “move faster”
- has a dashboard
- is “very early”
- already has enterprise interest
- will definitely add agents soon

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

When my coworkers try to discuss the emotional nuance of the finale at the water cooler, I simply hand them a one-page executive summary of the character death metrics and walk away.

Entertainment is just unstructured data. Stop letting it bottleneck your bandwidth.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

I don't watch Netflix. I just read the Wikipedia plot summaries at 3x speed using ElevenLabs.

I consumed all six seasons of The Sopranos in 52 minutes during my commute yesterday.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

That’s 45 seconds I wasn't aggressively scraping LinkedIn for warm leads.

The opportunity cost of a varied wardrobe is literally bankruptcy. Wake up.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

People ask me why I wear the exact same black quarter-zip every single day.

It’s obviously not a fashion statement. I’m minimizing decision fatigue to optimize my brain's API calls.

Last year, I tried wearing a blue sweater on a Tuesday. I spent 45 seconds thinking about it.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

It had an irresponsible amount of conditional formatting.

And I got the job.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

“Proficient in Excel” is one of the most common lies on resumes.

If you really want to impress a hiring manager, you need to show, not tell:

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

A few years ago, I applied for a role by sending over a spreadsheet that mapped the hiring funnel, flagged where candidates were dropping off, and highlighted which steps were wasting time.

It had formulas. It had filters.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

Cold plunges are oversaturated so I’ve moved on to liquid nitrogen.

Last week I filled a chest freezer, climbed in, and changed my life.

I’m losing most of the feeling in my left foot.

But my dopamine is so dialed in I can hear colors.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

I told him discomfort is the primary catalyst for growth.

I was asked to leave, but my brand awareness is through the roof.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

If you’re just lifting weights at the gym, you’re leaving money on the table.

The gym is a high-intent environment. Everyone there is actively trying to improve themselves, which means they are primed for an upsell.

I don't even work out anymore.

[Jonah @JonahSaya]

I just walk on a treadmill at a 1.0 speed and continuously AirDrop a PDF of our pricing tiers to everyone in the cardio section.

The gym manager told me I’m "making people deeply uncomfortable."