Jonathan Krsul

I was given $15 once to tell jokes, and $20 for selling the shirt off my back.

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

Hindsight is always 50/50

[Morgan Murphy @morgan_murphy]

sometimes I’ll read a tweet that’s dumb AND hypocritical AND mean AND self-righteous and I don’t even get sad I just feel like my mom when I’d come up to her in the drug store with a slinky and a tiny car and a weird little shitty magic trick and she’d scream “you get ONE!”

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@XFL2022 I'm so glad you are taking your time to make sure this is the most successful comeback of the league, just please 🙏 reach out to Bill Burr on the potential of guest commentating a few games

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@billburr please sir if you would kindly indulge me by reaching out to the USFL and XFL to negotiate a deal to guest commentate a few games in the future for either or both of the future spring football leagues

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@SteveSchmidtSES Two images come to mind. They do something like in Billy Madison when he wets his pants so all the kids think the other kid is cool for being trendy peeing his first, or in The Office when Michael vehemently defends his suit for being unisex when it's for women

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@ChristopherHahn C'mon. You're the expert. You know better than me that anyone can say they support anything that isn't real. He could support one holiday a year dedicated to dropping bubblegum from hot air balloons as long as he doesn't support getting rid of the filibuster for it.

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

Now that I'm thinking about Hollywood's love affair with cashing in on reboot stuff, where's Three Men and a Grown Woman/3 Men 3 baby???

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@MikeSullivan we lost Disco Dan Bylesma as a coach because he wouldn't make a few small shakeups in postseason crunch time, I only said what I said because I don't want to lose another beloved coach to the hot seat when I didn't even believe he was on it

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@penguins I hope I can ask you to let someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows Sully personally that I beg him to read Twitter for ten minutes today

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@MikeSullivan ...and the name of the guy who is in the top 5 toughest of the league, but they are the heaviest team overall while yours is the lightest!!!

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@MikeSullivan Not only do the Isles have 2 players who's names come to mind, the one who scores a small win for his team when he gets coincidental penalties with a guy who has to sit in the sin bin the same amount of time despite his disparate offensive abilities...

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@MikeSullivan The game needs pest control now and I'm no expert but I'd think a 6'6" 220 pounder could do that better than a guy who wouldn't be a middleweight... and yes, has, at least, similar offensive talent!

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@MikeSullivan I know you think you're doing the right thing, and you're getting paid the big bucks to trust you more than me, but if the reason Big Z wasn't in place of Gaudreau was because of protocol coming from Czech Republic then you're not watching the same games as I have.

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@MikeSullivan This isn't JUST plug & play your best pieces now that you finally have options with them all finally in your arsenal, it's matchups.

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@MikeSullivan to use an extended metaphor here, the regular season is a checkers game and you are in the conversation of being the Art Ross of checkers - but this is the playoffs, a chess match, and you are losing it to a great player with worse pieces.

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@Nick_Offerman Hey man I get it, curling isn't flashy...movies are... but I'm one of a few thousand fans outside Canada, but I also think a patriot would get the film started well before next winter Olympics!

[The Last Blockbuster @loneblockbuster]

May Staff Picks!

Colleen: Bee Movie (2007)
Emily: Gangs Of New York (2002)
Parker: Was laid off
Liam: Was laid off

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

I completely understand that the past 18 months have been like using an Aspen tree for firewood, I'm just saying that the Mira-Curl on Ice is going on 3 and I feel like our window of opportunity to have the @Nick_Offerman film is closing in

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@MacFarlaneNews Don't forget these 2

[Jonathan Krsul @JonathanKrsul]

@elonmusk your chapter in history books on the early 21st century would sure look awesome if you buy Myanmar and just fire the same military