Jerry_Seinfeld94

There's people inside my head

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Popping these tums like candy
#acidreflux

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Why is the hulk so FUCKING GREEEEN

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Joining a book club is WAY more gay than being homosexual

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Americans trying to tell you how to fold a piece of paper: so imagine a hamburger

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

I just saw the grim reaper pull up to the popeyes on a moped. I'm scared y'all

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

I had a dream that I was a woman and got kidnapped by Patrick Bateman from American Psycho. He kept me prisoner in his house and would torture me if I tried to escape. I eventually broke free from him and fled into the woods. I found an attack helicopter and used it to kill him

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

I knew that already

[Ken Klippenstein @kenklippenstein]

journalist who broke the story of Mitch McConnell's cardiac arrest says he's braindead (per her sources) 👇
https://t.co/4rWP3s47a7

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Fuck it's closed what do I do y'all I need money now

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Going to the money store to buy more money 💸‼️

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

"They didn't like it when we sexualized children, so let's sexualize animals instead!"

[Netflix @netflix]

MATING SEASON, a new series from the creators of Big Mouth, is coming to Netflix May 22.

Here's your first look at the cast including Nick Kroll, June Diane Raphael, Zach Woods, and Sabrina Jalees!

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

The autism accent is pronouncing "skeleton" as "skelington"

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Angry blind people be like "I can't see. That's not fair!"

[August 🐉🌴 @buffalodragons]

Gay people be like “I see” and “that’s fair”

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

When will the people in my head stop fighting

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Realest tip of the day, don't trust a discord server with a vent channel and an NSFW channel

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

White castle shrimp nibblers are back. Life is kinda cool sometimes

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

A bbno$ and Kesha collab would go hard. @bbnomula make it happen big dog

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

The only good ICE agent is a dead ICE agent

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

New Anthony Padilla video:
I spent a day with people who still listen to Lil Darkie

[Jerry_Seinfeld94 @JSeinfeld94]

Spiders are not cute and I will not accept this propaganda