Shower Thoughts

Thoughts from the shower. Mostly stolen from /r/showerthoughts, and

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

what if condoms had temporary tattoos on the inside so like when you rolled off the condom there was a picture of a dinosaur on your dick

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

When I move my body, I am literally moving matter with my mind.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Waldo wears stripes because he doesn’t want to be spotted.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Everybody stuck in traffic blames everyone else for being stuck in traffic

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Forcing someone to disable adblock to visit a website is a pretty good way to ensure they never visit again

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

The human body is over 70% water so really we are just advanced cucumbers with anxiety

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Music is just sculpted air pressure

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

What if when we have a near death experience it’s because something is wrong with us and God has to turn us off and on again.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Imagine being completely naked in a room full of strangers who all speak a different language and just want to touch you. That’s a dogs life

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

People thinks it’s crazy that an elephant can be scared by a mouse, but so many people are scared of insects.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Africa is the continent humans have existed on the longest, yet is the least developed.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

If you’re only defense for an argument is, “I have a right to my opinion,” you’re probably wrong.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

As a child I thought we would drive past skunks every few nights. I now realize that smell was probably just weed.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

It would be a lot harder to find a piece of hay in a stack of needles.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

I spend more time at the place that pays me than I do at the place I pay for.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

There are no animals in the Pokémon world, so whenever the anime characters eat meat, they’re eating Pokémon.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Will you marry me = a marriage proposal. Will, you, Mary, me = a foursome proposal.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Someday, someone will be the last person ever born.

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

I wonder if anyone has ever masturbated to me

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

The worst part of using Uber, is that I will never get to be on Cash Cab

[Shower Thoughts @JustShowerThots]

Vegans won’t eat food that animals suffered to make, but they’ll buy iPhones that children suffered to make.