Katie Watson Keys

Smart, funny, the whole hyper-organized package, complete with a master's degree. Big fan of coffee, coupons and my husband @BryanK3ys...not in that order.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

"I love that for you" is this generation's "Bless your heart".

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Be sure to lay out your favorite meat in the road, to be ready for the brine lines coming down tonight.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Get yourself a guy who lines up shots for you and plays your favorite bangin' music while you wrap Christmas presents for all the family. That's a keeper.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Sure, you can get all your Christmas errands done early, but then you'll miss out on all the panicky Christmas-Shoes-esque miracles happening at the cash registers over the next 48 hours.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Just walking around my house post-Thanksgiving, mildly cleaning, eating as I go.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Happy Fridge & Freezer Purge Week, to all who celebrate. 🦃 #ThePurge

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Don't forget to bring that Halloween candy bowl back inside. If you're cold, then they're cold.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Hubs and I are on the Olympic Lizard Catching Team - and we just got the GOLD 🥇 in the Living Room Scramble Dash against the blue-tailed skink 🦎

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

I was surprised when my friend said the place we're going for drinks and music tonight is outside, when it's 100° out. She will be equally surprised when I pull a neck fan out of my purse.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Me, knowing if I get up from my desk for a bathroom run, I'm going to forget all my deadlines and everything I was doing and my entire job

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Embracing the phase of Girl Scout Mom where I'm just duct taping the patches on, so we can be on time for the meeting.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Life happens in 5-minute units, whether you like it or not.

Dumping the dishwasher: 10 min? No, it's 5.

Gotta grab smtg really quick leaving the house: 30 seconds? Somehow also 5 minutes.

Making it to work 20 miles away: Put on your seat belt and watch this.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Something laid eggs in my mailbox and now ants are eating the eggs and my mail is covered in this atrocity of infanticide. Thanks for the nightmares, nature.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Ironing on Girl Scout patches with the precision of a military promotion ceremony. My girl is gonna look good.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

All halftime shows need to be done on rollerskates.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Just realized my daughter says "huntsman" instead of "husband", and we all need to adopt this ASAP.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Don't forget your kid has a Valentine's class party this week and needs the prepared cards with candy. And whatever else you signed up for a month ago.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Billy Joel can drop a new song 20 years later and it immediately slays. Well done, Billy.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but you typed January in your spreadsheet and it autofilled 2023 in the background. You should go change it to 2024 before you forget. You're welcome.

[Katie Watson Keys @KatieWatsonKeys]

Me, one month before my birthday, in the midst of Christmas planning, starting the plans for birthday coupon season.