Thank you @illenium for spending 3,146 minutes with me this year on @Spotify. You are my #1. #SpotifyWrapped https://t.co/TuWWdAQb8G
LOLLLL I NEED HELP
For some psychotic reason when I got my new ID I thought it would be a good idea to put my real weight on it and I’ve regretted it ever since. Truly tragic.
Last night we heard THREE FART NOISES coming from somewhere in our apt like a legit fart machine sound. Thought it was funny at first but once I realized no one did it I started bawling thinking someone was hiding in our apt trying to murder us. A fart murderer. Rip