KG4evah

Children and pets love me 😎

“You have personality with a capital P. AND IT IS SPARKLING.”

A silly goose disguised as a classy goose.

@OkMatchFish

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Why does John Mulaney look just like Agent Smith from The Matrix?

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

When 2 becomes 1. Isn’t that a Spice Girls song?

This is a joke about daylight savings time.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

I feel like the dad in “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” but instead of being able to trace the root of all words to Greek, I trace the problems of our society back to the patriarchy.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

It’s got kind of a Rube Goldberg vibe to it.
- me talking about how cars work

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Me just now: I need something for my tools. Something like a caboodle.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Moana was too scary for my five year old nephew. When I was around his age, I was watching the gulf war live 😬

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

It’s funny to be considered direct on the west coast and passive aggressive on the east coast.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Me: I’m brave!
(Sees flock of geese on path)
Me: I’ll walk another way.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

@austinrspence I am but a humble follower and not a friend, but if your friends aren’t taking you up for it, I’d love an invitation!

[Rod @rodimusprime]

I don’t know if anything has ever affected white people the way Will Smith slapping Chris Rock at the Oscars has affected them. Not the murder of civil rights leaders, not videos of cops killing Black folks, not January 6th.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

A lady on the bus said, “Did you see the Gorillaz?” to a man, and my ears perked up because I saw Gorillaz when they came here. He said he had and then she said, “They’re my favorite. Did you see the giraffes?” Turns out he had just gone to the zoo.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Oh no. I’m attracted to scrungly men, aren’t I?

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

I’m so shocked when I see people smoking. In 2023?!

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Going to see Oppenheimer on a third date so needless to say, romance is in the air.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Having ADHD is being in another room, happily doing something random, being like “Lalala! OH MY GOD, I HAVE SOMETHING ON THE STOVE!”

Anyway, it was only a little burned, and I’m fine.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

I have acquired a sewing machine. Soon all of my clothes will have pockets.

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Omg, the start of the Gorillaz song 😄

[From Here to Bitternity @caoraesque]

GULL MEME GULL

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

Make it a year

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Wtf?

[KG4evah @KG4evah]

Pigeons don’t seem very good at flying.