Tom Kelly

I once witnessed a grown man throw up a big mac on a Mcdonalds' employee. I'm the smartest dumb person you will ever meet.

[Kendrick Lamar @kendricklamar]

The Heart Part 4 https://t.co/C9M7ZH1o4v

[Albert Breer @AlbertBreer]

Here's the questions posed by the "Pardon Me Take" guys on the competition committee conference call (h/t @alexdelbarrio)

[Michael David Smith @MichaelDavSmith]

Barstool Sports crashed the NFL's conference call and proposed replacing PATs with a greased-up Andy Reid climbing the goal posts.

[Dave Itzkoff @ditzkoff]

"I can't be doing so badly, because I'm president and you're not." He actually said it.

[Tom Kelly @KomTelly]

@BarstoolBigCat DRAMA ALERT DRAMA ALERT 🚨🚨 https://t.co/P8dxq6Vtyx

[bita🌸 @Voldemorts_Lord]

came across a little canadian twitter drama tonight

[Tom Kelly @KomTelly]

Onward.

[PFT Commenter @PFTCommenter]

Shooter's shoot

[Milwaukee Bucks @Bucks]

Head Of The Class.

Malcolm is one of four rookies in NBA history to shoot 40% from 3 while averaging 4 assists per game.

#OwnTheFuture

[brandon / jinx / big jinx @brandonjinx]

Chappelle my only idol.

[Fox News @FoxNews]

On "Justice," Ben Stein slammed the judges fighting to stop @POTUS's travel ban.

[Kent @RealKentMurphy]

The Brewers are going 0-162 this year... https://t.co/WKOf7UYw1F

[Samantha Bee @realsambee]

.@POTUS In light of Comey's testimony, figured we'd fix this for you.

[Tom Kelly @KomTelly]

So when UCLA and UNC meet in the Elite Eight, the halftime show better be Lavar Ball Vs. Michael Jordan. Don't miss this opportunity @NCAA

[Meninist @MeninistTweet]

"do you know who my father is?"

[Tom Kelly @KomTelly]

#Big10 with another big win!

[Dave Portnoy @stoolpresidente]

ITS GREAT TO BE A MICHIGAN WOLVERINE! RICK PITINO LASTED 9 SECONDS IN THAT CLOSET! #SWEET16 BIG 10 Basketball >>>>> everybody else

[Tom Kelly @KomTelly]

@stoolpresidente And now the refs are tripping players...

[Bleacher Report @BleacherReport]

The Mailman doesn't believe in rest.

[Big Cat @BarstoolBigCat]

Rick looking extra ghoulish today

[Tom Kelly @KomTelly]

This is the worst game of basketball I have ever watched...