Cyparissus (On the Metamorphosis of Blue)
The color of his skin is not white but *glaukos*—
a blue that has given up on light.
Under the heavy crown of leaves,
he is already beginning to taste like wood.
Apollo held him like a broken tripod.
“Do not,” the god said, but the boy was already translating himself
into an adjective.
A long, vertical ache.
To love a boy is to watch him become a noun you cannot decline.
Look at his eyes.
The eyelashes are wet with what we call history
but he called the weight of a hand on his neck.
There is a tiny fracture in the air between them
where the arrow passed.
[Some philologists argue that *pothos* is a kind of thirst
that increases as you drink.]
His throat is a column of salt and cold sap.
He wanted to be still.
He wanted the god to stop looking at him with such bright, unbearable grammar.
The stag was just an excuse, of course.
One does not weep this hard for a beast unless the beast
is the only part of the lover
that was allowed to die.
Now the green begins at his temples.
“I will mourn you forever,” the god whispered,
which is the most violent thing you can say to someone
who is trying to slip quietly into the soil.
To be immortalized is to be pinned like a wet wing
to a blue page.
He does not look back.
His pointed ears catch the sound of the wind before it becomes a word.
We call this a transformation.
He called it
getting out of the sun.