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Formerly @MGoWonka, now not doing much of anything.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Ohio, you think Brady Hoke is fat? Tell me what fitness plan you all use to get in such great shape.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Urban Meyer, you put a new sign up in the locker room? For optimal results, recruit players that know how to read.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Sparty and Ohio, you are laughing because Michigan lost tonight? Please tell me how your teams did in the Final Four.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Syracuse, you want to talk about how much better you are than Michigan? That strategy worked out really well for Florida and Kansas.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh VCU, you have a defense called "Havoc" that forces opponents into making mistakes? Why didn't you try using that today?

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Sparty, buying SDSU clothes to root against Michigan? Tell me more about why it's unfair to call you "little brother".

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

And how is that working out for you? RT @DerrickNix25: R.I.P ta da competition.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh? Please tell me more about how rough your life is. RT @justinbieber: Worst birthday

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Indiana, you lost to an unranked team last night? Guess it's not so easy when you don't get to bring your own refs.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Sparty, Michigan hoops is a 1 year wonder now? Interesting assessment from a team that is 1-3 in the last 2 years against them.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Buckeyes, you didn’t offer Trey Burke a scholarship even though he’s from Columbus? Your team must be undefeated also then. Right?

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Sparty, 18% is the amount of bowl game tickets you’ve sold? I thought it was your football team’s average test scores.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh, Buckeye fans, mad because Braxton Miller didn’t win the Heisman? Well at least you have your bowl guh……….oh, wait.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh, Virginia, Rutgers, Maryland, and Georgia Tech are joining? I suppose the Big Ten will have the Leaders, Legends & Losers divisions now.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Sparty, making fun of Michigan for losing to an undefeated team yesterday? Please tell me how your season went.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Ohio, you have an entire song devoted to not giving a damn about Michigan? Well now I’m convinced you don’t care.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh, @KirkHerbstreit & @MikeAndMike, Purdue is going to beat Michigan? Please give me more of your awe-inspiring football wisdom.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh Notre Dame, you don’t want to play Michigan now? Please tell me more about why you call yourselves “Fighting” Irish.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh, you root for a Big Ten team besides Michigan, and want to make jokes about them? Please tell me more about how great your team looks.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @LanceGordon]

Oh, MSU is playing against Notre Dame? I'm sure the stadium will be filled with only the classiest of individuals.