I see the tweets asking men to mentor boys & I know you all mean well but you clearly have never left your child in the midst of men only to find out that they asked him if he was having sex at age 8, belittled women in front of him, or tried to fill his head with sexist ideas.
People who don't put in the effort about to get mad about this, but yeah if you're not reaching out, making plans, showing up, don't expect the closeness to just exist! A lot of life and personal growth happens in a year, even in months. If we were close 2 years ago but you haven't made the effort and we don't talk, you don't know me anymore! That's now a different version of who I once was, and otherwise you have a parasocial relationship with me based only in what you see me selectively post on social media. Had to have reaaally honest convos surrounding this concept when I got married so I stand by that, ten toes down!
People get offended because they don’t want to admit you need to nurture friendships the same way you do romantic relationships. Just bc you’re not fucking them doesn’t mean they don’t deserve your time, attention, affection and tbh physical and emotional labor.
the discourse around this is highlighting how the “you don’t owe anyone anything” movement has created a large population of ppl who are astounded at the concept of showing up for ppl if you want them to be close to you