It often grows from repeated small acts of integrity: keeping promises to yourself, acting in line with your values even when inconvenient, and enforcing boundaries. Those choices build self-trust and the quiet certainty that you deserve the same regard from others. Experience and reflection usually play bigger roles than any single insight.
Self-respect sets the baseline for how others treat you. It lets you hold boundaries, walk away from mistreatment, and stay aligned with your own values instead of shrinking to keep the peace. Without it, relationships tilt into imbalance or quiet self-erasure. When you value yourself, mutual respect becomes possible rather than optional.