IRS: You owe us money
Me: OK, I’ll pay it online!
IRS: The last name you entered does not match
Me: Ummm, I’m pretty sure I know my own last name
IRS: Don’t talk back. You owe us money.
I can’t get a date, so this heartwarming video about a lonely camel becoming best friends with a rescued cow is just a slap in the face. #wheresmycamel
Overheard just now at 7:11:
Hot Girl: Is that the only champagne you have?
Clerk: Yes.
Hot Girl: You don’t have Brut?
Clerk: No.
Me: She should temper her expectations going forward.