Chris McIntyre

[Gary Lineker @GaryLineker]

Beggars belief.

[Empire of the Kop @empireofthekop]

Man United fans! 😂

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

I just voted Jordan Henderson in the #FIFA16UKCover Vote! Who has your vote? http://t.co/3Qs6zTpnhs

[Gary Lineker @GaryLineker]

I reckon @PetrCech is a bloody great signing for Arsenal.

[Connor Wickham @ConnorWickham10]

Cmon girls! ⚽️ #England

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

Who's Next for Liverpool FC then? I'm hoping maybe another Top Striker and also a Centre Back! Anyone else think of any?

[Mark Nixon @marknicko68]

“@ALANMYERS1: Respect to LFC http://t.co/ZbwafRtTQm” > @reid6peter brilliant this - where else would that happen!

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

holy shit imagine a crab bringing you breakfast on a tray like a lil waiter http://t.co/FTQJjuBnGR

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

http://t.co/NUBbWbOm6S Gay people are such great dressers because they've spent a lot of time in the closet.

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

http://t.co/wMip4nb0EZ "I just dumped my girlfriend lol" - a cannibal after taking a shit.

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

http://t.co/Odf8SNfpvZ Did you know that six days a week T.G.I. Friday's thanks God for nothing?

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

If you elect me president, the national unemployment figures are guaranteed to drop by at least one. http://t.co/RC3xitzF7M

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

http://t.co/LxkCKkTmW5 "I liked small butts. I was lying." - Sir Mix-A-Lot's teary deathbed confession

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

It's wisest to pick the side of the person who knows the most shit about you http://t.co/sdN5tC5GhM

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

http://t.co/osEMHiK0rN Some people are about as useful as the "r" in February.

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

http://t.co/ze78KPSQ9N Rubbing my ass on these documents because the boss's email says to "cheek his paperwork".

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

http://t.co/xZkntUYX I judge a book by it's cover when the cover is a picture worth 1000 words.

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

My neighbors listen to great music... whether they like it or not. http://t.co/QUhxv7YQ

[Chris McIntyre @Macca453]

http://t.co/j2cDc9O3 If Taylor Lautner bites you, how much time do you have until you turn gay?