Maia

Smart enough to know better; dumb enough not to care. Inbox open if you need support. ♥️

[Maia @Maichosis]

I'm so glad Twitter exists so I have a place to showcase the gradual decline of my mental and physical well-being.

[Maia @Maichosis]

When you're a kid, bedtime is when your parents say it is. When you're an adult, bedtime is when you've had enough.

[Maia @Maichosis]

The bullies kept kicking me in the balls, so I got my balls removed. What are they gonna do now? Dick Kickem

[Maia @Maichosis]

Never talk to me or the bullfrog that lives in my pond again

[Maia @Maichosis]

Why wine and dine when you can stone and bone?

[Maia @Maichosis]

Briefly thinking about an unclockable transfemme with an OnlyFans, call that a passing thot

[Maia @Maichosis]

The kids who coped with The Great Recession by talking shit in MW2 Hardcore Search and Destroy lobbies are built different.

[Maia @Maichosis]

I want to go to an unamusement park. Just show me YouTube trending thumbnails until I kill myself.

[Maia @Maichosis]

Ehlers-Danlos diarrhea got me like snap, crackle, and poop

[Maia @Maichosis]

The secret to living in the moment is being unable to handle anything else.

[Maia @Maichosis]

Obscure your stupidity by regurgitating cursory knowledge on esoteric topics.

[Maia @Maichosis]

I'm spearheading a body negativity movement. We're all disgusting.

[Maia @Maichosis]

Accidentally put a twig in my non-stick pan, and it fucking exploded

[Maia @Maichosis]

Calling my tits the truth because you can't handle it

[Maia @Maichosis]

If you can self-diagnose, I can give you a unprofessional second opinion that you're neurotypical and are looking for something to blame for why you suck at life.

[Maia @Maichosis]

I'll bet you haven't even tasted the bathroom floor. Step off.

[Maia @Maichosis]

@rajakz3 Your logic is as impenetrable as it is inscrutable.

[Maia @Maichosis]

I'm not a bad bitch. I'm just bad and a bitch.

[Maia @Maichosis]

@rajakz3 I've fooled another one.

[Maia @Maichosis]

If you think this shit is scathing, you should see my depression journal.

[Maia @Maichosis]

My Tweets should have a Scoville rating based on the percent of normies they could make cry due to cognitive dissonance.