Big Pharma Company

We specialize in keeping you just healthy enough to buy our drugs in perpetuity for the rest of your life.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

@JMaraganore Not to mention we can pay them less and totally mistreat them because they have no other options, amirite??

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

Anyone still hung over from #ASCO20 ?

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

@superwoman513 @MelDMann

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

Today is the #SuperBowl Keep an eye out for our commercial about our latest wonder-drug and make sure you ignore all the horrible side effects they say really quickly at the end.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

@InvestorsLive Karyopharm 🤮 - you should talk to someone that works there and see if they're as confident as you are. Lol

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

@MelDMann Profit margins.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

Part of growing old is watching your heroes pass on to the next phase. See you on the other side, Kobe. #RIPMAMBA

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

🎶This is how we do it!
It's Friday night, and I feel alright.
Our Washington lobbyists are working overtime. 🎶

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

All this talk in the #DemocraticDebate about healthcare costs being too high, but not one mention of Baby Yoda. Disappointing.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

Just saw @megtirrell doing a keg stand and now I've got JP Morgan BINGO! Who do I return my ticket to for the prize? #JPMorgan2020 #JPM20

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

@rcurtisspalding Try to avoid the rapey finance guys.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

So it's 7am and I've already made eye contact with both a homeless person AND a billionaire and both made my skin crawl. Must be #JPM2020 #JPMorgan2020

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

We're gonna make so much money selling the antidote to the flu shot once we activate the autism gene in them. Just have to hit this button... right... here... ☑️

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

Was trying to figure out if we had a cure for a sore throat and realized it's already been invented and it's called Oxycodone.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

Oh sure [consulting company], I'll pay you $350k for a few PowerPoint slides, but only because I don't want to do them myself, not because it's worth it.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

We're moving our European headquarters out of England. Can't possibly trust those people to do the right thing. #UKElection

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

We've got a new drug out that costs more than your house, but don't worry, it only costs you $10. We promise it's not affecting the economy in a negative way or contributing to an excessive concentration of wealth to the 1%.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

We love our (commercially insured) patients! 💕💕

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

@JMaraganore @GretaThunberg *your ... but no worries, we don't need to hold CEO's to a 6th grade grammar standard.

[Big Pharma Company @MajorPharmaCo]

We got that Big Copay energy.