Always 2 reads:
1. What she likely meant
2. What a winner would assume she meant
Remember the first, but ACT on the second
Being wrong that she liked you > being right she didn't
4. If you want to find your limiting beliefs, take a look at every place you feel:
→ Resentment
→ Shame
→ Hopelessness
→ Chronic tension
→ “I should be further by now”
Those are the pointers.
Five things I stopped doing that changed my life:
1. Trying to fix the people I loved
2. Apologizing for my emotions
3. Performing a version of myself that was more "lovable"
4. Avoiding uncomfortable conversations
5. Telling myself self-criticism is an efficient way to change
The older I get, the more I believe this: Every major breakthrough in my life, in some part, came from feeling something I'd spent years avoiding. Not thinking harder, trying harder, or applying a new system. Just letting the emotion I was running from finally land.
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Be the sun.
The sun is Above.
It doesn't chase you. It is not shining to give you light.
You expose yourself to it. You receive it. When it's too hot, you move to the shadow.
The sun doesn't move for you.
When you want it, you hear its call - but it is not calling you.
The call - is in your own body.
The sun is being.
Light is expression coming from its immortal shape. It energizes your presence, but doesn't need your presence to justify itself.
The detachment is the gift. It makes it true.
It was being before you were here, and will continue being long after you're gone.
A fixed point of Greatness. Always available. When you seek it.
Be the sun.
Let others pull themselves up.
(closing for KU/NO, Chapter 05 Play To Win)
How women test dominance in men.
She puts openings and sees if he takes them.
She acts submissive and sees if he leads.
She tries to peck him down and sees if he lets her.
She's a total bitch and sees if he stays.
@gerhardfanta@GotPickup Because fuck the idiots.
Trying to love an avoidant woman is like attempting to milk honey from a rock and then being punished for it. Can only do that game from BG pedestalization and scarcity.
In TG you tell the avoidant to fuck off then it's their problem to solve.
If I choose that my win is to to X, people who are aligned to also do or be X benefit from my leadership vector, it allows them to passenger and collaborate.
Party, vegas, friendship, startup, relationship, etc.
If they don't want that thing, they are filtered out, no biggie.
If they want to join but are parasites saboteurs, they get punished by exclusion, get kicked out.
This is super simple and logical.
Our side is rather simple bro.
Be who you are / who you have to be, and lead. From there she follows or not.
"Make her feel something"
That's my own quote and it's an antidote to "tell her how you feel" which doesn't do anything, but making her feel something is not the solution here, because the problem is also not "how to keep her"
She's free to follow or not. Following her around is doomed.
@angeldevenganza Genius article. That's the same instinct I have when running my company, give before they ask, when you know the time is right. If you give after they ask it appears much weaker.
You lie to avoid negative judgement.
You create the lie to distort perception in order to obtain positive judgement.
Lying is a direct byproduct of validation seeking.
Reject validation seeking and the need for lying dissipates.
When I took my "oath to never lie again" it came in hand with "I don't need to be liked"
The first few times I would say the truth where I would have normally lied sent me through a mini shock.
It was brighter on the other side.
==
Besides ditching validation seeking, look at reality as a compound of logistics.
Every exchange with another human being, once you remove the need for validation, is about sorting things out to achieve a common goal.
So go above that task and attack the actual problems.
You go from
"The reality is not my fault please don't judge me"
To
"This is the situation and this is what needs to happen"
Then, when judgement comes - they are judging reality.
Ask reality if it gives a fuck about judgement.
Actions solve reality and move things forward.
I gets brighter on the other side.
@re4mat0r Your lead is communicating what needs to happen.
Example. You want to light up the tension.
The alpha makes a joke.
The beta explains that lighting the mood is needed.
One makes it happen. The other transfers the power so somebody makes it happen.
@re4mat0r The woman doesn't have the capacity to listen to explanations. Explanations are bad leadership and will just make shit worse. But she'll respond naturally to proper lead.