Matt Cronkleton

[Donna Wright @DonnaWr34914422]

@MattCronkleton

[Matt Cronkleton @MattCronkleton]

@SpillTheMemes You know you sang those words in place of the originals. In your best Axl Rose voice. I did. 🤣🤣

[Super 70s Sports @Super70sSports]

I miss the days when the news smacked so fucking hard Peter Jennings had to fire up a heater just to deliver that shit.

[Damani Felder @TheDamaniFelder]

The UFC paid for this, not you. You paid for benefits for illegal immigrants and Somalian learing centers. And that's largely why your groceries are expensive.

Hope this helps.

[Super 70s Sports @Super70sSports]

Only four times in NBA history has a player led the league in scoring, won the MVP, led the playoffs in scoring, won playoff MVP, and was 1st Team All-Defensive.

Career leaderboard:

Michael Jordan, 4
Everyone else who ever lived, 0

[Matt Cronkleton @MattCronkleton]

@USATODAY

[Spill The Memes @SpillTheMemes]

😂

[217Problems @217Problems]

Effingham man films what it’s like to experience a tornado

[Matt Cronkleton @MattCronkleton]

@AmericaReal3 Also, was there a pizza party after completion?

[Kelly J Kalweit ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️🐸🇺🇸 @KalweitJ]

@IfindRetards

[Sholdon Daniels @SholdonDaniels]

Chicago Bears should have drafted a roster full of Haitian immigrants.

Chicago would have funded the entire program.

[Vince Langman @LangmanVince]

The Chicago Bears managed to stay in Chicago despite the 1929 Great Depression, WWII, and the 2008 financial crisis, but they couldn't survive two incompetent Democratic leaders in Illinois and now they are moving next door to the Republican run red state of Indiana!

[SouthernPatriot61 🇺🇸 @SPatriot61]

🐸🇺🇲🫡

[Matt Cronkleton @MattCronkleton]

@SPatriot61 Hey! That’s my wife! ❤️🐸🫡⚓️

[Mike Bales 🫡🇺🇸 @MikeBales]

My grandfather said he’d never move into a retirement home.
He said, “Too expensive… and the food tastes like someone boiled sadness.”

Instead, he checked into a beachfront hotel.
We asked, “Grandpa, isn’t that even more expensive?”

He smiled and said, “Not really.
At the retirement home, I’d pay $200 a day for cold meatloaf and no visitors.
But here? For $150 a day, I get ocean views, room service, fresh towels, a pool…
…and suddenly all my grandkids remember I exist every weekend.”

Then he leaned back in his chair and delivered the final line like a mob boss:
“And if I die in the hotel lobby, the manager will actually look disappointed.
But at the nursing home? They just call it Tuesday.”

[positive side of X 🌞 @positivityofx]

He went on a vacation trip and gave a little wave goodbye to his cat, but it was only when he got back that he saw on the security camera that the cat had responded.

[Nick Sortor @nicksortor]

🚨 LMAO! A DoorDash driver was just asked if the White House is a good tipper

DRIVER: "Ummm..."

POTUS: "WAIT!" *pulls out $100 bill*

DRIVER: "Yes! Very!" 🤣🔥

[Matt Cronkleton @MattCronkleton]

@haveaconcern Classic Canadian Shitmobile.

[Under Secretary of War Anthony J. Tata @USW_PR_HONTata]

Pleased to share the story of another brave warrior impacted by the COVID-19 vaccine mandate, Devin Berry.

E3 Berry, an Aviation Boatswain’s Mate, was involuntarily separated in July 2022 after refusing to take the COVID-19 vaccine. After @POTUS signed EO 14184, he contacted the @USNavy to pursue reinstatement. He worked directly with the Navy COVID-19 Reinstatement Team to swiftly navigate the process. On October 14, 2025 - under the leadership of @SecWar & @SecNav - he was reinstated, promoted to 3rd Class Petty Officer, and awarded backpay & 3 years of active-duty credit.

“I wanted to return to the Navy because…[of] my job being an ABE, which is the best job in the Navy. I was given another opportunity to finish my career doing something I love.”

Welcome back to the Fleet, ABE3 Berry!