Andrew Matz

#blahblahblah #pretentiousbio

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

Since we’re disregarding scientifically backed federal health guidelines, now.

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

The CDC now recommends that citizens avoid gatherings of greater than ten people. So...is work going to notify the ten of us they want to show up tomorrow? Or, is it true the virus is so advanced it knows not to spread to people who are at work? #AlmightyDollar #ombudsman

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

The used bookstore finally had a copy of the dystopian novel I had been anxiously awaiting to buy. I did, however, decide not to buy the book, as living it seemed like a more immersive experience.

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

Social Distancing: The most responsible thing you can do is self-isolate to help mitigate contracting, and spreading, COVID-19.

Discount Airfare: You should socialize distantly like the CDC recommends.

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

We’ve only just begun, and it is almost assured that #SocialDistancing will end with me owning Disney+, Netflix, and Amazon Prime Video subscriptions.

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

Me vs. COVID-19 vs. Flossing

🎶...I almost feel sorry for what I'm gonna do...🎶

#BrandNew

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

Just your average Nebraskan trying to sneak a peek at Iowa’s caucus. #Election2020

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

Here’s looking at you, Feste. #AprilFools #letthemusetheirtalents

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

With Kentucky not making the #FinalFour, we now know, for sure, that John Calipari did not commit any recruiting violations this season. #MarchMadness

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

The Joe Flacco trade to the Broncos is now official. 😔 #HelloDarknessMyOldFriend #ElwayOut

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

K-State upsets Kansas once again. I can't wait for "Instant Wildcat Classic 2: We're a Nationally Relevant Program...Kinda" to come out on DVD. #ComingThisSpring #SunflowerShowdown

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

Restaurant Idea: Soup d'Etat

Traditional soups served on plates, classically, as an entree with two sides. One being a salad, of course.

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

That wasn’t even the best halftime performance by an areola in Super Bowl history. #SuperBowl #PepsiHalftime

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

What everyone forgets about the "Bears. Beets. Battlestar Gallactica." episode of The Office is that remainder of the episode is complete garbage.

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

Go. Big. Red. #VolleyballSchool #Huskers

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

30 minutes to bi-colored, precinct level, electoral maps. I need it like oxygen in my lungs. #InjectItIntoMyVeins

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

@paintingcorner Michael Tucker
Kit Pellow
Kila Ka'aihue

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

Considering the events of the last two weeks, I am having trouble deciding whose political charade most wreaks of desperation: Jeff Flake (AZ), Ben Sasse (NE), or Susan Colins (ME). #ObeyYourThirst

[Never Manage Alone @NMA_Blog]

#FantasyMLS week 29 presents plenty of point scoring opportunity that is ripe for the picking. @MatzyMatz lays out his favorite picks for this weekend’s action.
#fmls #PlayerPicks #MoneyBeets https://t.co/dr807XjsoJ

[Andrew Matz @MatzyMatz]

#ShamelessSelfPromotion

[Never Manage Alone @NMA_Blog]

Come check out our #MLS Fantasy picks so you don’t trip and fall to begin #MLSFantasy’s second season. #JosefMartinez17 #ATLUTD #mmoralezoficial #NYCFC #OfficialGio #LAGalaxy #OrlandoCitySC #HoustonDynamo #SportingKC https://t.co/BLn7yNQTrz