J

CTID. ✝️✝️

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

there's nothing that i dislike more than a failed nap attempt.

[ArtButMakeItSports @ArtButSports]

Lamentation (flipped, detail), by Gerard David, 1515-23, 📸 by Roberto Schmidt

[Fabrizio Romano @FabrizioRomano]

🚨🇺🇸 Folarin Balogun starts for USA vs Belgium.

[The xG Philosophy @xGPhilosophy]

Cristiano Ronaldo generated just 0.03 expected assists per 90 at World Cup 2026.

At that rate, he’d be expected to register one assist every 33 full matches based on the chances he created.

[J @MCFCJay84]

That’s my Bernardo

[Erling Haaland @Erling]

Well well well 😂

[Manchester City @ManCity]

Erling Braut Haaland.

[Fede Rodríguez @federodr]

—¿Esa rubia cuántos años tiene?
—25.
—Uh, justito. ¿Cómo se llama?
—Erling Haaland.

[ArtButMakeItSports @ArtButSports]

Children's Games (detail), by Pieter Brueghel the Elder, 1560, 📸 by @kgmadeit1

[Manchester City US @ManCityUS]

Doing the row at home for Haaland

[J @MCFCJay84]

Haaland!!!

[J @MCFCJay84]

HAALAND HAALAND HAALAND

[Não Intendo @blognaointendo]

Sabia que eu conhecia de algum lugar

[Hater Report @HaterReport]

Cristiano Ronaldo when he not playing Uzbekistan

[Rodger Sherman @rodger]

taking out a defender by slamming the ball off their nuts, getting the rebound while they double over in pain, and then scoring a goal is one of the most diabolical moves I've ever seen in any sport

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

A Waffle House at three in the morning. I ordered hash browns. The waitress, Charlene, turned toward the kitchen and shouted.

"Scattered, smothered, covered!"

I rose from my stool.

These were battle commands. Shouted across a room, fast, in code, the way a captain calls a line into position. Something was happening. I prepared myself.

"Who is under attack?" I asked.

Charlene turned back. "Huh? Oh. That's just your hash browns, baby."

I sat back down slowly. "...The potatoes have their own commands?"

"Mhm. Scattered means on the grill. Smothered's onions. Covered's cheese."

"And there are more?"

She counted them off without looking at a menu. "Chunked is ham. Diced is tomato. Peppered's jalapeños. Capped's mushrooms. Topped's chili. Country's sausage gravy."

I was silent for a moment. Nine words. Nine fates, for one potato.

In my homeland, a man earns a name through a lifetime of deeds. Here, a hash brown can earn nine in a single night. I had badly underestimated this country.

"I want all of them," I said. "Every word. The potato has earned them."

"...You want it all the way?"

"All the way. To give it fewer would be an insult."

Charlene shouted the whole thing back into the kitchen, the full litany, and the cook answered without turning around, and I stood again and bowed to him, sergeant to sergeant. He did not see it. It did not matter. I knew.

It came buried. Onions, cheese, ham, tomato, peppers, mushrooms, chili, gravy. You could barely find the potato underneath, which seemed correct, because by then the potato was no longer a side dish. It was a decorated soldier.

I ate the whole thing with a fork in both fists. It was hot and filthy and magnificent. I have eaten in palaces. I have never eaten anything that was honored this thoroughly.

So tell me, America.

You can shout the same potato into nine different lives.

Who wrote this language, and where can a foreigner learn it?

And the cook who answers in code at three in the morning. Is that a kitchen, or a war room?

[StatMuse FC @statmusefc]

Erling Haaland has scored a 2+ goals in each of his last 6 competitive matches for Norway.

Robot 🤖

[Georg Pazderski @Georg_Pazderski]

Zlatan Ibrahimović bringt es auf den Punkt: „Ich habe Fußball auf höchstem Niveau gesehen, den echten Fußball. Nicht diese verwässerte Version, die sie uns jetzt auftischen.“

Es ist ein anderer Fussball bei dieser WM 2026:

⚽️ Hybrid-Rasen
⚽️ Trinkpausen für Werbung
⚽️ Endlose Schauspielerei
⚽️Verpetzen anderer Spieler
⚽️ Dubiose Entscheidungen
⚽️ Rot für das Sprechen mit vorgehaltener Hand
⚽️ Fußball-Zwerge
⚽️ 48 Mannschaften
⚽️ 170 Schiedsrichter
⚽️ tlw. unterirdische Schiedsrichter-Leistungen

Es gab eine Zeit, in der Fußball noch richtig begeisterte und Schiedsrichter kein VAR brauchten - sie waren VAR.

[Ulises @UlisesDavid__]

*un pedofilo se me queda mirando en el parque*

yo con 7 años pensando que era un ojeador:

[Frnk @MC_frnk]

He’s literally the only player with zero haters