jade

[audrey @amatrxx]

When this covid shit is over ima go to the gym and get a gf

[jade @memory_lapse_]

@Psyk1cJake @Vivek4real_ Never thought of this

[ant @persistantz]

he tryna ignore how the days fade into one another
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[໊ @wynavira]

what substance do i have to abuse for this unbearable feeling of yearning and limerence to finally go away

[jade @memory_lapse_]

The dentil hygienist is catching my print. My eyes are up here

[𝒻𝑒𝑒𝓁𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈 @int6wn]

soft launching my disappearance

[jade @memory_lapse_]

@priyanshi_goel_ Don’t even know you and i think lesser of you now for this shit

[Qui-Gon Jim @jimbojd4]

Big pussy was cool until he started snitching

[jade @memory_lapse_]

I get like 15 scam calls and 2 fake google texts and a fake tinder match a day. My phone has become a scamming machine on top of a brainwashing machine and somehow it would be Unabomber level reclusive if i just didn’t use it anymore

[aus @sauczsa]

Yes son I met your mother in the bpd sluts discord server

[jade @memory_lapse_]

They evacuated my whole apartment building because according to the 911 call transcripts that led to a young girl being trampled to death in the panicked escape, someone called in saying it absolutely wreaked of updog

[jade @memory_lapse_]

@Adi13 This is so dumb. The religion split over the divinity of Christ. You don’t solely own the religion that existed before Christ, both sides of the split own it. That might be controversial, but it’s the true

[colin @bonyromo]

They’re doing doing pussy analytics and I’m one of the old assholes in moneyball who’s like look pal I know good pussy when I see it

[hunter @3gpmh]

gang why doesn’t she miss me like i miss her

[jade @memory_lapse_]

When she complains about money so you send her some to help out because you care and she posts a story of a new purse the next day

[jade @memory_lapse_]

@KnoxiteTheocrat This is advice i was hearing in 2014

[bobby @bobbylikesbeers]

shaving my entire body before I go play trivia at the dive bar

[jill @littlefucky]

My nana’s last words were “Sha Shabba Ranks” 😳