healthcare pls

smudged glasses all the time // he/they

[to a homeless guy: sorry i don’t believe in fiat @websiteidi0t]

The hat man waiting for me to finish work and take 500mg of Benadryl to sleep

[eleanor @dimestorepaglia]

a sample of dennis hopper saying “no, i want you to FREAK it!” would unironically go hard

[𑣲⋆｡˚ emily ⚞•⚟ @emilyedie07]

why is she dressed like evil paddington

[helen @helen]

embarking on my chinese language journey

[sage 🧚‍♀️ @btwnrevolutions]

Dani. 55. Stone top. I was butch before you were even born.

[mysillycomics @mysillycomics]

my Halloween comic from 2019

RIP David Lynch. Thank you for being you and making your art for all of us

[Mr. Chau @Srirachachau]

If you haven’t seen it, you should check out David Lynch’s DumbLand, which is just Lynch doing a cartoon full of violence and farting. Earnestly one of my favorite things

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

come on dawg

[toyotathombudsman @thomcrowley]

DON DRAPER: These Simpsons, they’re yellow?

ROGER STERLING: As the day is long.

DON: And the boy?

ROGER: Bart, lotta triangles on his head. (puts out cigarette) Sister, too.

[emmy rākete 🇵🇸 @cannibality]

no, Karl Marx is great, I just didn't think he'd be Chinese is all

[Actual Names @ActualNames1]

Fart Low

United States, Census, 1940

[dack @kcadbackwards]

burger menus are always like

THE CLASSIC - a normal american cheeseburger
THE DIRTY COWBOY - BBQ sauce and an onion ring on it
THE PIG FUCKER - a special blend patty, pulled pork, bacon, and a gochujang/pig blood mix mayo topping
THE PIG LOVER - it's the pig fucker but vegan

[Joe Kassabian @JoeKassabian]

Thank you for these targeted ads, Instagram

[Fishtopher and Friends @mrfishtopher]

love and compassion are infinite resources. i know this because i love and care for you more every day

[Nether @NetherBro87]

I FUCKING FOUND IT

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

glenn beck invited me onto his show. i didn't reply. now im thinking of accepting these requests just to spread conspiracy theories. "my three friends had cancer. they don't now. you know why? *whispers into mic* high rise pants"

[November @postoctobrist]

well the best shirt I’ve ever ordered arrived

[Unworthy Hand @kisstheblade_]

Literally every reply to this tweet lol.

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

a fashion instagram account asked me what are my ten favorite products. i name things like pigeon food and cat water fountain. apparently one of the least popular features they've done.