MercysSword

[Cesar JB @CesarJB]

Um homem entra em um bar e pede um uísque.

Em vez de beber ali, ele sai e se senta em uma mesa do lado de fora do bar, para apreciar a bebida com calma.

Poucos minutos depois, uma freira passa pelo local, vê o copo em sua mão e o repreende:

— Meu filho, como você pode colocar na boca essa bebida do demônio?

O homem sorri e responde:

— Bebida do demônio? É só um uísque.

A freira insiste:

— Isso é pecado. Faz mal para a alma.

— A senhora já experimentou?

— Nunca! Só ouvi dizer que é horrível e leva as pessoas ao mau caminho.

Depois de alguns minutos discutindo, ela faz uma pausa e diz:

— Pensando bem... talvez eu devesse provar. Assim posso saber do que estou falando. Mas não posso ser vista bebendo uísque. Você poderia pedir um para mim em uma xícara de chá?

O homem concorda, entra no bar e fala ao atendente:

— Por favor, mais dois uísques. Um deles pode vir em uma xícara de chá?

O barman bate as duas mãos no balcão e exclama:

— AQUELA FREIRA ESTÁ AQUI DE NOVO!

[Her_Nonymous_Diary @Her_Nonymous_D]

Last night around 10:30, someone knocked on our apartment door.

Me and my partner froze for a second because our complex can be… unpredictable.

We never open the door late at night unless we’re expecting somebody.

So we talked through the door first and realized it was one of our neighbors — a quiet college student we usually just wave to when he’s outside walking his dog.

When we finally opened the door, the poor guy was completely drenched from the rain.

Turns out he had accidentally locked himself out of his apartment and had been sitting outside for over an hour trying to figure out what to do. He admitted he was too nervous to knock on random people’s doors for help.

Honestly, I understood immediately.

He’s young, queer, from out of state, and clearly the shy type. He finally decided to try our apartment because he knew we were a queer household and thought we might feel safe to ask.

So of course we invited him in to get warm while he waited for the locksmith.

What was supposed to be a quick favor turned into a couple hours…..

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@TheStaad I was grateful when mine came through, even though the guy I was dating when I started it didn't work out and never dated since. I was a horrible wife and never really took marriage seriously and it was good to face up to that. Ending emotional shred fest was hard but good in end

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@TheStaad @jeff_of_norwich I hope your annulment comes through without problems. It is better to do it now! One of the deacons was relling me how difficult it is for elderly people who meet someone in the nursing home to get.
All their witnesses are no longer around.
Glad I got mine, never plan to use!

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@agonyhope1817 I look at all the jobs being replaced by AI and think about you. Most of those office types probably don't write nearly as well as you either. What are they going to end up doing? Is sad!
Maybe look at the view from 30000 feet up. I worked in manufacturing, good $ and fun!

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@Nero Ptayer side gonna win, now and for eternity

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@Nero Praying!!! Those cats, and all the rest of us, need you so much!

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@agonyhope1817 Honestly the whole "positivity" thing is a scam, rather like "self actualization." All this crap sounds therapeutic and nice, but is really just a way to focus on ourselves and our egos. Look at the people in your Bible, what do they focus on? Faith, truth, stuff like that.

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@agonyhope1817 Flounce is such a delightful word! All heroines go through rough patches, right now you remind me of Sara in "A Little Princess" made to do errands in the cold in a too short dress. But she had her vivid imagination and you do too. Things have a way of working out in the end!

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@agonyhope1817 I think it has to be more nuanced, some are just too low in to live independently, many are addicted, and some appear to like the "lifestyle" so may not be financially reasonable to give them all 24 hour attended care...sigh

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@TheStaad Apparently I was a little too forthcoming in my annulment paperwork. They finally granted it, but I needed a session with a Catholic therapist and a warning that I might need further counseling should I ever decide to remarry. Occasion has not come up so guess I am in the clear!

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@AgainstAtheismX Screwtape Letters, then Narnia series

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@Nero Really Milo? Serve him up like a pork roast so your followers can stick a fork into him? Where is this empathy that you have been whining about? In the coming days and weeks we are going to see all sorts of people grabbing a mic, you included. I would rather see this kid than NF!

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@WildfireWhisper You might check out some of the more recent Doteen Virtue videos. When I used to go to New Age stores I thought her books looked a bit silly, but she also has undergone a conversion and talks about how to get rid of what seems to be (but is not) harmless occult stuff. God bless!

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@theemmacasey Believe me, nobody gave it a second thought. We have all these gestures in the Vatican 2 Mass, some do them and others don't, some say all the responses and others don't. No big deal

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@agonyhope1817 Dear one. I get your revulsion. But...pee is generally sterile, although poop is not. Please make sure to keep some disposable gloves in your purse or locker, they are not expensive. And changing a catheter is not easy, so there must have been some sort of distressing need...

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@AshFarms I know this seems counter intuitive, but in your search you might try a Catholic Mass. Catholics believe that Jesus is really present when the Priest consecrates the bread and wine. I am a convert and not perfect, but for me now Protestant services seem sort of empty somehow

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@CrazyVibes_1 Have a big, over the top wedding and make forever memories! You do not look foolish, you look adorable!

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@Nero It's those gosh darned cats, you opened to door to them and just look what happened

[MercysSword @MercysSword]

@drdenwalker I try to stay in ketosis as much as I can. I have noticed that scrapes and bruises (I work an outdoor job) heal really fast. I hardly ever get sore either. Love it!