Mikey Maxham

[Mikey Maxham @MichaelMaxham]

@sadhotgirI @grok is this real

[Joe Kassabian @JoeKassabian]

Remember, DOGE had to cut funding to all of that worthless woke shit like air safety and weather forecasting so our conservative government could spend it on important things like gilded ballrooms.

[ariana grindcore @jackiecore666]

If you're looking for a laugh, check out Family Guy on FOX- but disregard the dog Brian. He is poisoned by the left

[Conor Rogers @conorjrogers]

Republicans: we don’t use pronouns

Also Republicans: Coal is a girl

[Covie @covie_93]

Christians praying for the passage of a bill that will hurt the poor, sick and children to help the rich....

[Acyn @Acyn]

Jennings: If you're over the age of 21 and you go to Disneyland or Disneyworld and you don't have children—straight to Alligator Alcatraz, El Salvador.

[Gf Be WILIN @gfbewilin]

ghosted my own dad I promise I have no problem ghosting you

[Jesus H Christ! @ThatBloke_Jesus]

Just unfollowed Judas!

[jeje @jestJJmei]

How is rent for 28 days the same amount as 31 days??? Where my change!!

[miss princess baby @hahbibti]

Stress is not good for the baby (me)

[sorchaiscrying⸆⸉ | seeing h again! @Sorchaiscryingg]

CACKLING.

[Bö Jänke: Hönkÿ @Bob_Janke]

The guy at the grocery store just charged me $400 for Canada Dry Ginger Ale

[Terri Schuester Updates @terri_updates]

Donald Trump announces that Sue Sylvester will lead the Department of Performing Arts.

[Douglas A. Boneparth @dougboneparth]

Daylight savings is not enough. You need to be daylight investing.

[bailey @Baileymoon15]

cant wait to jump off of it tonight and shut it down again

[Applebee's Grill + Bar @Applebees]

Fiscally Applebee's, Socially Applebee's

[Emily Murnane @emily_murnane]

How I feel when the Trader Joe’s cashier tells me what I good job I did picking out yummy things

[Kylie Brakeman @deadeyebrakeman]

I can’t believe “they’re eating the dogs” was a REBUTTAL to “You say weird stuff at your rallies”