MidwestComedy

Funny people live in the Midwest. Here's to them... but I'll drink to you too.

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

People from the Midwest can't watch movies like Finding Nemo... they don't want to find Nemo... they want to fry Nemo.

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

Police officer tells farmer that his wife fell out of the car a few miles back. Farmer says, "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"

[Julian Smith @JulianWasHere]

Did Lenny Kravitz ever get away?

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

When asked when my dentist appointment was, I responded "Tooth Hurty."

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

Hunger is prevailing. I hope I find something on the side of the road soon.

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

How easy would it be for a ventriloquist to fool a farmer?... This easy. http://bit.ly/g83YQG

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

Chris Farley's 1st Interview! Very funny! http://midwestcomedy.wordpress.com/

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

Egg says to pan: "It might take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by a chick this morning."

[Personal_Fouls @Personal_Fouls]

When your ex turns texting into sexting, and you're out with someone new, it's time for a #lockout.

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

Sassy Gay Friends? West Coast, but HILARIOUS! http://bit.ly/gqi1cE

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

How can a Midwestern mom ruin the Final Four?... Check out this video. http://midwestcomedy.wordpress.com/

[Just Casper @CasperVatikaki]

3 Brazilian men died in landslide. That's just a terrible, devastating tragedy! BTW, how many is a Brazilian? Is it more than a Million?

[Bruce @BtotheD]

I'm penning a toilet-humored opera for ten-year-olds. A poopera, if you will. And it's called "Rock Me Amadeuce."

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?.... The wheelchair.

[Things Nobody Says @thingsnobodysay]

"I go to stripclubs for the conversation." - #thingsnobodysays @thingsnobodysay

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

Check out this blog on some quirks of the Midwest... Northerners, you'll either love it, or be offended. http://bit.ly/gwQOkI

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

Midwest Celebrites... Yes, they would be fatter. http://midwestcomedy.wordpress.com/

[MidwestComedy @MidwestComedy]

If celebrities were from the Midwest... This is God-awful... but so true. http://bit.ly/9QAEML