Mike Ross

What if I told you I could consume knowledge like no one you've ever met.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

How can I be ready for the future when I'm not even ready to get up in the morning.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

Time is precious, waste it wisely.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

Loyalty is a two-way street. If I'm asking for it from you, then you're getting it from me.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

O,B,C,T.

The only letters of the alphabet that fat people know.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

I have a tendency of loving everything that destroys me.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

I know I'm a handful. But that's why you've got two hands for.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

The lottery gives you a 1 in 200 million chance you won't go to work tomorrow.

Alcohol gives you 1 in 5.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

Due to the sad state of my sex life, I have converted to Islam.

My new name is Seldom Bin Laid.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

All good things are worth waiting for and worth fighting for.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

If I don't respond to your insult, it means what I wanted to say was too mean and I decided to let you live.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

Oh, you think I'm pretty? "Pretty stupid."

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

Suits is back. Catch me and Harvey back in action.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

But we'll make it.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

Fun prank: Put $1000 in an envelope and mail it to me.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

I swear some people were conceived through anal sex. There is no way being that much of an asshole is natural.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

People aren't against you. They're for themselves.

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

All of my prayers & thoughts are with France today. #CharlieHebdo

[Mike Ross @Mikejamesross]

Don't make me feel like a flower in a vase then treat me like a cactus up your ass.