Elyse Beal

A BEST friend scolds you like a dad, cares like a mom, teases like a sister, irritates like a brother, & loves you more than a lover.

[Elyse Beal @Mini2Murel]

Whenever my wife sings I have to go outside. Not to get away from her, but to prove to my neighbors I'm not beating her.

[Elyse Beal @Mini2Murel]

I think i can become a doctor. I have the handwriting for it.

[Elyse Beal @Mini2Murel]

How to shave like a man http://t.co/x7c4Gn0qxw

[Elyse Beal @Mini2Murel]

Russia summarized in one picture http://t.co/aqAQ8qbN83

[Elyse Beal @Mini2Murel]

Life Guard: Don't dive off that board! There's no water in the pool! Dummy: It's ok I can't swim!

[Elyse Beal @Mini2Murel]

You don't got to like me but you damn sure gonna respect me

[Elyse Beal @Mini2Murel]

Grammar is important. For instance, commas save lives: Let's eat grandpa. Lets eat, grandpa.

[Elyse Beal @Mini2Murel]

My Boss asked me to start the Presentation with a Joke; I attached my Salary Payslip on the 1st Slide.