Mitchy Dee

Comedian
Merchant Marine Deck Officer
Haitian Sensation
Habitual Line Stepper

sc: mitchydee65
insta: mitchydee65

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

@kxmbxrly_29 m

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...ll

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

Just posted a photo https://t.co/2dvUT1qBHm

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

If you purchased the Logan Paul-Mayweather fight and were disappointed, knowing full well that it was gonna be goofier than a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse episode, then you deserve that shit 😂😂 🤡🤡🤡🤡

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

I'm calling it now: there's gonna be some jabroni who just made off with 6 canisters of gas from Hess thinking he was 10 steps ahead and finessed the apocalypse and is gonna smoke a cigarette in celebration..only for the whole car to go up in flames.
#manifest #peoplearedumb

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

I've learned so much from the people that never existed. Learned the facts of life from watching The Facts of Life

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

"Guru Pathik: The greatest illusion of this world is the illusion of separation. Things you think are separate and different are actually one and the same.
Aang: Like the four nations?
Guru Pathik: Yes. We are all one people. But we live as if divided." Avatar spitting facts

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

I don't like showing up to Black people's parties early because then I instantly become a part of the setup crew. #iykyk

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

I need to get back on stage.

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

Anyone else get weird recommendations from https://t.co/tqgej42ZUr on fb? Scrolling down for memes and see an ad for a pulsating led cock ring and I know my porn searches haven't gotten that dark, so where the fuck are they getting their algorithm..well anyways I bought two

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

My toxic trait is that I can effortlessly flirt back and still be 100% not interested.

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

remember that tension of seeing another school while on a class trip?? just immediate beef, it was on sight 😂 #repyourset

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

People are really out here thinking that they need a spouse, when really what they need is a therapist.

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

Being a teen today is wild. Back in the day, you got bullied for being a nerd. Nowadays, you're getting bullied because your mom didn't put up enough ass pics on her OnlyFans.

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

Actual conversations I've had with my friends at 4 A.M.:
*phone rings*
J: "Yo Mitch, you won't believe what just happened"
Me, just waking up: "Dude, I'm not going to war with the cartel. Stop"
😂😂😂😂😂

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

Weird thought #82 cont.- That trip to the bathroom when your tripping feels like a side quest, because you go from a bright "safe" zone to a quiet isolated place. The silence seems suspicious and we dont linger heading back to our base like we're back in middle school playing tag

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

Weird thought #82: The thing about when youre tripping is the place where you and your friends congregate  and start the trip essentially is the "safe zone". That is your home base. Everyone essentially goes on their own individual trip adventure- cont.

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

You know you're getting old when the pornstars you grew up with are in the vintage category 😂😂😂 #ifyouknowyouknow #justjokes #oof

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

#doubleshotatlove is already my favorite show hahahaha

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

When you get home and can finally be yourself
😂😂😂 #justjokes #memes #comedy #laughter #skeletor #laugh https://t.co/97birxnE2q

[Mitchy Dee @MitchyDee65]

Apparrently my little guy's been busy since I've been away because Shinobi had puppies! Feeling like the luckiest Dog Granddad in the world!! #puppiesforsale #pomsky #pomskypuppy #puppies… https://t.co/G20u92vbT1