Macks

Get 50% off your next Doordash order at: mail/man

[Macks @MJ_babs]

I am the Michael Jordan of playing basketball badly

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@cassieensealion The devil’s song is way cooler but it’s all smoke and mirrors. When it comes to fiddle playing he’s inferior

[Macks @MJ_babs]

Damn girl your toilet paper is thin

[Macks @MJ_babs]

Thinking about him

[Macks @MJ_babs]

look at this cat I just met

[Macks @MJ_babs]

Got so drunk I forgot Adolf’s last name

[Macks @MJ_babs]

Someone called me a Studmuffin in 2007 and I’m still living that high

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@lizziemarinara Let him in!!

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@GarciaVanessaYo Horrible but unfortunately not uncommon

[Macks @MJ_babs]

Huge news for my company!

[Babcock International @Babcockplc]

Fantastic news that we’ve won a £400 million contract to manage and operate Skynet, @DefenceHQ's satellite communications system. Babcock and our partners bring stability and best-in-class solutions for this vital and exciting new contract. https://t.co/RFeggVJF8f

[Macks @MJ_babs]

Sometimes I get Ubers just so someone is forced to converse with me

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@samanth_uhhhhhh 25 but my math was like 19 😬

[Macks @MJ_babs]

I want to leave this world as I entered it, prematurely

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@gabaghouly don’t

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@samanth_uhhhhhh THE WOLF OF SNOW HOLLOW

[Macks @MJ_babs]

Thinking about how amazing of a friend @gabaghouly is. If Lizzy were an ice cream flavor they’d be mint chocolate chip cookie dough because that would be my favorite if I wasn’t lactose intolerant. You’re the bestest of friends and your IQ is at least 40 points higher than mine.

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@ItsJeffWilliams I was supposed to be the future heir of dairy…. Now I have nothing

[Macks @MJ_babs]

When I yell at the football players on my TV, they can hear me

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@bigbradsk Chipmunks are baby squirrels

[Macks @MJ_babs]

Fun fact! If you wear sunglasses in the woods at night while drunk you’re legally a bat

[Macks @MJ_babs]

@nieltown If I get a library card can I take some bites from your books?

[Macks @MJ_babs]

This is 2/3rds of my name

[The Green Kasey 🎃 @RawbertBeef]

I think HBO Max, Peacock, and Discovery+ should merge so they can make a new service called Maxcock+