Because feelings are fleeting. They are influenced by mood, by circumstance, by the way someone said good morning or the way they did not text back fast enough. If you build a relationship on how someone makes you feel, you are building on sand. One bad week, one argument, one moment of distance, and the whole thing shakes. But when you build on who you are becoming, you build on something solid. You build on growth, on alignment, on mutual evolution.
Am I growing? Am I becoming more secure, more regulated, more expressive? Or am I shrinking? Am I becoming more anxious, more doubtful, more disconnected from myself?
If none of the growth is happening, you should not be there. No matter how you feel. No matter how much history you share. No matter how much you love them. If you are not becoming a better version of yourself, the relationship is not serving you. It is holding you back. And love is not supposed to hold you back. It is supposed to propel you forward.
COVID-19 might have been six years ago BUT it took a toll on us. Nobody remained the same. Time feels faster. The energy feels off. People are colder and more detached. Careers paused, some lost their identity. While some are still stuck. The world we knew never really came back.
Add this to a spray bottle with warm water and a bit of baking soda 😭and ur house will smell so good, spray on curtains and linen and towels 👍I love 1 and 4
There’s an Instagram page called 35mm.learn made for photographers, videographers, and content creators. It covers lighting, cameras, and other useful tips for people in that space.
Highly recommend checking it out!
Ask your partner how they slept, how their day was, about work, what's on their mind, why they've been quiet, why they are being sensitive, what they'd like to eat, and where they'd like to go; make it a habit. Never let them feel unseen, unheard, or ignored.
I don’t want to become bitter or overly self protective but I’m at a point where I don’t wanna tell ppl what I’ve been through. Ppl will pretend to be supportive for a certain amount of time but deep down they’re using what you’ve been through to measure what they can do to you
I have always maintained that there are things in life that can humble you
1. Your partner
2. Your child
You have no control here, no matter the love and your teachings.
As a former side niggà, one thing I think a lot of men should know is that the person your babe is cheating on you with is giving her the nastiest sex of her life.
The things they did or are doing in bed, you have not done half of it with her.
When a man knows you are in a relationship and you decide to cheat with him, he’s fvcking you to prove a point. He makes sure the sex is so good that you’ll keep coming back.
The way dem dey spin your babe, you no even sabi say she freaky reach that side. If you forgive a cheating partner, I no pity you, walahi.
The saddest part about liking someone nowadays is having to guard your heart like love is a danger zone. You can’t even like someone peacefully without wondering if it’s real or if you’re just another temporary experience to them. Dating now feels like choosing between being played, confused, or emotionally drained because too many people treat hearts like hobbies and relationships like temporary entertainment.
Ngl, I’ve tried “anyone” before and I know what it feels like to be held but not felt, to be there but not truly seen.
Now I crave something softer a connection that is safe, stable, and emotionally mature. The kind where we both show up with clarity, communicate with care, and love without games or mixed signals.
So no, I can’t settle… not after knowing how painful it is to feel alone beside someone who’s supposed to love you.
I was today years old when I learned
If you feel it in your chest it's fear
If you feel it in your stomach it's intuition
If you feel it in your head it's anger
If you feel it in your muscles it's anxiety
If you feel it in your mouth it's disgust
If you feel it in your throat it's sadness
If you feel it in your face it's shame
If you feel it throughout your body it's happiness
Ambitious people are my type. I can’t even hide it, once you start talking about doing impossible work, the kind of talk that inspires greatness, you have my allegiance till the wheels fall off.
We may fail (woefully) but we will never be guilty of not trying.