Montgomery

SC ➡ Chicago

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

“You should put on your Tinder profile ‘Uninsurable but DTF’.” Jokes on him, I got insurance this morning

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

Overheard at the car dealership: “I wish I was a drug dealer at this point. Cause what I’m doing ain’t working”

[Avery McClure @avery_mcclure]

Just diagnosed as “a bit much.” There is no cure

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

"Heartbreak Hotel is booked"- @TylerSheridan27

[Back to normal Chris! Trans Rights still tho! @ChrisLafond10]

@HamiltonWestEnd Two things:

1) your musical is about a guy who wasn’t a fan of monarchy
2) she was ruler of a country that oppressed people who looked similar to members of your cast.

She brutalized them as they fought for independence.

It’s kinda sad you would honor her

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

It just…. Makes me happy to be alive

[prance @bocxtop]

of course people don't wanna work anymore, who the fuck is gonna risk dying over $9.50/hr before taxes

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

Embarrassingly watching the new @BachelorABC and I’m cringing watching Clayton interact with the new host before meeting the women. it’s like 2 Kronks sharing one brain cell. #wewantedOlu #orRodney #orBrandon

[mattie lubchansky @Lubchansky]

planning on becoming even stupider in the new year. more of a bitch as well. please update your files

[Lyra, Esq., is NOT DAREDEVIL @PinkRangerLB]

“You’re so resilient!” Thanks! My options were that or dead

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

@createdbyjazz There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t know in my heart that someone based this meme off my life

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

@matt_nid I recently made a simple syrup with blackberries from the farmers market and it goes very well in a margarita or a vodka lemonade #justsayin

[Neil Carter @godlessindixie]

My personal rule is that I won’t go maskless into any place where the employees have to wear one. It’s not a hardship to wear one for minutes when others have to wear it all day.

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

@HRHChemist

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

@createdbyjazz good news- I'm no longer an "honorary POC" turns out I'm actually POC and I can't wait for the DNA ancestry results

[Billy @lanottebianche]

me and the boys when covid is over

[jonny sun @jonnysun]

always be critical about who is extended the privilege of empathy. empathy can be weaponized as a tool of oppression and violence like everything else. when those in power make calls for empathy, ask empathy *for whom* and take note of who is not afforded that privilege.

[amigga @_KILLA_KEV]

WE GOT NORMAL RACISM BACK

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

DONT. DO. IT. Dating a chef is not the dream we think it is 😂

[Montgomery @MontyPithy]

Anyway, this is the energy I need from a partner

[caitie delaney @caitiedelaney]

Ok... just found something kind of interesting while reading the original script for The Addams Family (1991)... anyone ever see this?