Drunk Mother

Professional Drunk. Part time mother.
Parody account

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Im shaving my pussy tomorrow! @SpoiledPuss 😸✂

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

@spoiledpuss girlfriend took a pounding today. Good for him. #jealous

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

The real reason i named my cat @spoiledpuss Sebastian is because he was infested with crabs when he was given to me. #kittylove #crabs

[Spoiled Sebastian @SpoiledPuss]

@MotherDrunk already puking on the dumb dog lmao, I love this bitch!

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Liquor makes me quiver, beer makes me cheer, wine is divine, and sober...is a harsh reality

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

@veron_noir blood alcohol content...

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

@veron_noir my B.A.C :) 👍

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Chores done :D #productive

[Spoiled Sebastian @SpoiledPuss]

And the day begins @MotherDrunk is on her 1 beer... Oops i mean her 10th, damn sexy paws 🐾

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

@iMustRelate and fuck like donkeys! :D

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

@SpoiledPuss Great! Now i'll have something to make for dinner :)

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Happy hump day! Im gonna get my twerk on to celebrate! and by twerk i mean get blackout drunk off absinthe and dry hump my cat @spoiledpuss

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Whats a taylor swift? It sings?! Hmm. I always said the day i see a slutty broomstick sing is the day i quit drinking.... (I like to lie)

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Grocery list:
Wine
Cat food
Cat litter
Cat medication
Cat toys
Cat nip

@spoiledpuss and I got a Hot date tonight

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Im no t as think as uou druunk i am

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Yea i have kids, i just don't know what i did with them.

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Im a cool mom! I tweet a lot so you all know how busy and popular I am.........

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

Cats high. Im drunk. Life is wonderful!

[Drunk Mother @MotherDrunk]

My cat is like...
( @spoiledpuss )
#bestfriends

[Spoiled Sebastian @SpoiledPuss]

Getting so fucking fucked up off this cat nip right now #fancyliving