Alex Krumins

#comedy #standup #standupcomedy

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

Her: “Just talk to me!”
Me: starts talking
Her: “UGH! Who even TALKS like that?!”

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

@TheDeltaChron https://t.co/vYukAREQsU Does Fred Flintstone make the cut? Stay tuned to find out!

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

@JessRMcKenna great show. It were a pleasure to meet you.

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

Our national anthem is now "Yakety Sax"

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

.@mentalpod I used to hate it when you got down on yourself. Now it feels like a familiar catchphrase. Shut the fuck up, Paul=Did I do that?

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

.@TheDeltaChron I think you guys really missed an opportunity by not calling yourself "The Delta Podrant" @JeffBezos

[Janie Haddad Tompkins 🇱🇧 @janiehaddad]

And yet, a show hosted by Paul F. Tompkins @ComedyCentral in the late night slot would be HILARIOUS. #pftforcomedycentral let's trend it!!!!

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

I would watch every episode twice. Once by myself and once with every friend I have (one). #PFTforComedyCentral

[Shawn Nyberg @shawnnyberg]

Me right now - "There are people shooting fireworks. I should go talk to them."
Me in an hour - "So this is what a jail cell is like."

[Modern Seinfeld @SeinfeldToday]

When George falls for a Twitter bot, Kramer claims he once Catfished himself. J:How’s that even possible? K:Oh I’m good Jerry. I’m real good

[Moshe Kasher @moshekasher]

Literally what all sit-ins are.

[Sarah Silverman @SarahKSilverman]

Just curious not gotcha-ing...

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

@jackiekashian Great show in Lawrence last night. You have to be one of my favorite white comedians.

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

@ItsKaraCake

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

Now Developing:
"Unemployed Trophy Wife afraid that Lazy People want to take her money."

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

@DougBenson When are you going to make an episode of "Doug Loves Procrastinating"?
#tweetrelief

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

.@danielvankirk
"Look good, feel good." Is the best advice I've gotten all week.

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

@AppleMusic Please bring back the Artist/Song/Album bar. Or at the very least, make it customizable.

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

@DougBenson "Pirate movies" Movies rated (Arrgh) that start with a (Sea) #leonardmaltingame

[Alex Krumins @MrKrumins]

@nerdist
(Ask me if I liked the latest podcast)
Like it? I Joseph Gordon Loved it!