NYC MTA

The Metropolitan Transportation Authority runs the New York City Subway, one of the most famous public transit systems in the world.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Remember, a crowded train is no excuse for unlawful sexual conduct. Or, really, any sexual conduct. Don't have sex on the trains, guys.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Attention customers: We regret to inform you that Kim Jong-il has died.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

All trains are currently delayed on time.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

The MTA website is currently down for maintenance. Please visit mta.info for more information.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

All trains are once again running on their normal schedules. In other words, with massive delays.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Due to damage from the hurricane, our subway cars are outdated, badly maintained, and smelly.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Customers with monthly passes can be refunded for unused days due to Irene. All refunds issued in MTABux™. Cash value 1/1000th of a cent.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

The subway system is still shut down. Upon inspection, we found damaged tracks and debris on platforms. We also found some hurricane damage.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Please stand clear of the closing doors. Also, the hurricane.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Subway service is now suspended. If possible, could anyone give us a ride home? We didn't completely think this through.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

We are fully prepared for a blizzard.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Reminder: Subway service will be suspended starting tomorrow at noon. We suggest you stock up on subway trips now.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Due to the weekend subway and bus shutdown, Hurricane Irene has been canceled.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Due to the possibility of delays due to Hurricane Irene, there are massive delays.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Due to the earthquake on Tuesday, expect major delays.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Due to the heavy rain over the last two days, trains may be wet.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

@Gtmsharm We are sorry, but due to construction, you will have to catch the Hogwarts Local.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

Due to delays on the N train, there are delays on the 7 train, which has caused delays on the 123 trains, thereby delaying the D & F trains.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

@JohnRobertWilso We apologize. Our engineers will fix the problem shortly, but due to train delays, they have not shown up for work.

[NYC MTA @MTATips]

The train you need is not currently running.