Connor Murphy

only here to get unexpectedly famous one day

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

I’ve officially reached meditative lawn mowing age

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

At the point in my life where I’m starting to like almond joys. You can interpret that however you’d like.

[Micah Parsons @MicahhParsons11]

I didn’t get drafted until 2021

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

To all the bears fans who thought I was being friendly and waving to them at Cascade Mountain this weekend; that was my middle finger inside of those target brand mittens, pal. #goskidownthehancock

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Reaching that point in my career where people are starting to call me Mr. Murphy instead of Connor, and I’m not sure I love it

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Been around track and field so long that every time I hear someone talking about yards, all I can think about is that grassy area in front of my house

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Same shit, different toilet

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

January 29th, 2025. 6:40pm

Wordle: second try
Connections: no mistakes
Mini crossword: 50 seconds
Strands: no hints

And I still have to attach my resume to job applications??

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Just fixed my gfs shower instead of having them wait for their landlord to come look at it. I’m officially Mr. Cool, if you need to contact me, please reach out to my manager

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Your biggest fear should be me driving on the freeway when I’m 90

[Buitengebieden @buitengebieden]

Rainy days.. 😊 https://t.co/OY5uFnoCIa

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Inflation is crazy. It costs twice as much to be a side sleeper these days #thanksrepublicans

[Kung Fu Kenny @kenny_bednarek]

Turned a dream in high school into a plan and that plan into reality.

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Crazy insane psycho

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

#delulu

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Seagulls must just think that parking lots are tiny hard oceans

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

I train and lift weights most of my life up to this point just for some girl here for volleyball camp, who wasn’t much taller than me, tell me that I’m short and she could beat me up

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Jokes on me. I thought Patrick Stewart and Sandra Bullock were the same person #oopsmoment

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

@trevor_dimpfl Well good thing it wasn’t English class then

[Connor Murphy @MurphJConnor]

Just gave a presentation for a class. When I looked out at the class while I was presenting, all but one person out of the 35 person class, was looking down at their laptop. It made presenting a little easier knowing nobody cared that I was up there.