James Meehan

South Ribble u-16 triple jump champ 2001. Professional Doofus

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

Is Kevin's toothbrush approved by the American Dental Association or not?

Why does this bother me so much.

[Bobby Mair @BobbyMair]

Revenge is best served cold ten years later

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

To all the kids who don't do well on their exams, I'd just like to say that Richard Branson didn't get any GCSE's and he's a proper bellend.

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

Spotify has a new function they're testing called DJ. They speak to you specifically then play you songs and it's properly eerie. As if you're the only person in a nightclub and the DJ is staring at you from the booth screaming "DO YOU LIKE THIS?!"

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

What type of music are you into?

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

Thanks to all who nominated me. On to nationals.

#wedontstop

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

Commercial radio stations,
7am is too early to bring sexy back. I'd like mild politeness brought back, anything above that is overkill.

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

If you can't afford to do the fringe you shouldn't go

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

I've never really got ABBA, but earning millions from a musical show of your holograms whilst still alive is the exact type of laziness I can get behind

[Brian Butterfield @MrBButterfield]

@GaryLineker Anytime 💪

[Lucy Watson @Lucywwatson]

New "£xxx isn't a big salary" just dropped. This time it's £1m. https://t.co/VQZS2abTFc

[Captain Bendy @robmulholland]

AUSTRALIANS! I'm in Perth right bloody now and I'm coming for Adelaide too. Shows start when it says on the poster. An hour of really funny stand up comedy with no surprise sad bit. If you want to know if you'd enjoy it then watch the link in the replies

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

Joined Costco. The amount of money I'll save on petrol and pizza means it'll have paid for itself in about a week.

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

The bots that follow me on here aren't even trying anymore.

[H @BRITT4INE]

Could be the best video ever made

[Dean Coughlin @deancoughlin_]

Forgot about this…

It’s mushroom szn 🍄🍄🍄

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

I'm not a monarchist but I've just had a chippy tea

[James Meehan @NamesMeehan]

You kids need to grow up. In 1976 we didn't complain. The whole country went to the lesser free trade hall to watch the Sex Pistols instead. You don't know your born.