Jeffrey Greene

Charming and alarming. Avid escapist.

[Bruce Greene @brucegreene]

Every time you say something to someone on the internet, imagine you're standing in front of them saying those words.

Then ask yourself: "Would I talk to them like that in person?"

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@AchievementHunt Good advice that shouldn't be advice: use your brain, not mine.

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@OJessicaNigri Use your brain, not mine.

[Dani Donovan 👩🏻‍🎨 ADHD Comics @danidonovan]

Time flies when you have #ADHD... or it crawls.

The inability to judge the duration of time passing has been a lifelong problem. I lose myself in the moment during interesting tasks, and get impatient/restless during boring ones.

Biggest lie I tell myself? "One more minute!"

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@Axialmatt It's a convenience fee at a convenience store, a grocery fee at a grocery store, a pet fee at a pet store, etc. Also, I'm not serious.

[SFGiants @SFGiants]

It's even more impressive in slow motion. 😳

#SFGiants

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@LogansTwitty @SFGiants Narrator: "It was, in fact, not fine, by any definition of the word."

[Spider-Man Movie @SpiderManMovie]

This 10-second snippet of the #SpiderManFarFromHome score gets us every single time. 🕷️🎶

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@Ritestweets @Avengers Iron Thormerica

[Let's Play @RegulationLP]

*swoosh*

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@RoosterTeeth Whoawhoawhoa. Why does Tabby-with-two-i's have two eyes?!

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@GavinFree Which one will you use more?

[SFGiants @SFGiants]

We loved your spirit too, Stan Lee.

#MarvelNight | @TheRealStanLee | #SFGiants

[Skillet @skilletmusic]

UNLEASHED // 2 1/2 years old // 9 tours // 23 countries — CERTIFIED GOLD! Thank you SO MUCH to all of you who support @skilletmusic and making this album cycle such a memorable one! I truly never take receiving one of these for granted. - @MorrisonSeth

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

Spotify's algorithm got jokes! I started my playlist, got in the shower, and it played "Drowning" by Backstreet Boys, followed by "Walk on Water" by Family Force 5. 😆 https://t.co/NPBYCXOcYN

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

Crazy to me how two worlds collide, like hearing @JeremyNDooley (of @1551Band) singing "Feel Invincible" by @skilletmusic in Minecraft #365. (What a weird sentence)

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@GavinFree

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@AchievementHunt Idk, but I really want y'all to try to pop Myatt's chair with the toothpick crossbow.

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

Give. Me. A-Force!

[Jeffrey Greene @NegaDistance]

@GavinFree You, sir, are one of a few who still use Twitter correctly.