Josh

Josh | My pronouns are Fee / Fi / Fo / Fum

[Josh @Nephzi]

@damzychillin Bonucci technically

[Zwë 🍟 @ZwebackHD]

This Germany Curacao game shows why the expanded World Cup is so embarrassing. Can you imagine a serious team losing 7-1 to Germany before all these new teams were let in?

[Neil Stone @DrNeilStone]

The worst part of Covid was that 20 million people died

[daz @MetamateDaz]

1 year of mass deportations

your rent hasn't gone down, groceries have gone up, gas has gone up.

Maybe it's time to admit immigrants aren't the problem.

[Josh @Nephzi]

@Neduszn8 Zlatan…

[Josh @Nephzi]

So because Mamdani lies about being a democratic socialist who is actually a straight up socialist, every actual democratic socialist is also lying?

[RedWave Press @RedWavePress]

Bill Maher SLAPS AROUND self identify “Democrat Socialist” David Cross:

David Cross: “I’m politically more Democrat Socialist.”

Bill Maher: “You’re plainly to the left of me if you even say you’re a socialist.”

David Cross: “Well, I said Democratic Socialist.”

Bill Maher: “I know what Democratic Socialist is, that’s Mamdani. Who’s a straight up communist.”

David Cross: “No he’s not! No he’s not! Bill!”

Bill Maher: “He is, first of all. He has someone working for him named Cea Weaver. Have you read about her?”

David Cross: “I have not.”

Bill Maher: “See, that means you’re in a bubble. Because you should have. Okay, let me tell you who she is. She’s the head of like, ‘We’re going to fix housing.’ This is like what got him elected. [Mamdani] has not disavowed her and I could show you all her tweets that she’s put out over the last few years and quotes, and one of them is ‘elect more communists.’ I don’t think you have to read between the lines if somebody he stands with and by is saying that. And also, her other quotes are like, ‘All home ownership is racist.’”

David Cross: “Well, that’s ridiculous.”

Bill Maher: “Exactly.”

David Cross: “I have an issue with that thing that she said. I don’t know this woman. I will definitely look her up. I’m a fan of Mamdani’s.”

[Josh @Nephzi]

My mums a sick cunt

[bee 🍉 @beereadingshelf]

being called a sick cunt or a good cunt is the highest form of flattery in australia

[Bob @BobBurn97207272]

Dear Muslims of the Australia.
My family and I have decided to move to a Muslim country. We haven’t picked which one yet — we’re still shopping for the best benefits package.
Obviously, all my neighbours want to come too. And their neighbours. And their mates. And their mates’ mates. Before you know it, half of Australia will be turning up with suitcases and a vague sense of entitlement.
As a large Christian community, we’ll need a few small adjustments:
Please start building churches immediately. Proper ones with bells. Loud bells.
We’ll also need certain streets closed once a year for our processions. Don’t worry, it’s not five times a day — we’re not animals.
Every supermarket must stock proper pork, bacon, sausages, and baked beans. We are a minority now, so you’ll just have to be understanding and accommodating of our way of life.
We’re bringing all the dogs. Expect many happy Labradors shitting on your pavements. You’ll need dog parks, and you’ll need to smile while we walk them past your mosques.
While we’re at it, your religious holidays are a bit… much. They might offend the Christian community, so we’d appreciate it if you could quietly bin them. Thanks.
In schools and workplaces, our children and staff must be allowed to wear large crucifixes, eat ham sandwiches in the canteen, and generally radiate Christian vibes without anyone clutching their pearls. We also demand prayer rooms in every building, plus translators because we can’t be bothered learning Arabic.
If any of this is refused, please send a list of police station addresses so we can report you for discrimination, Christianphobia, and general nastiness.
One more thing: if my kids burn your flag because Australis just won at football, please be understanding. I’ll give them a really stern telling-off. Maybe even make them write “sorry” 50 times.
Finally, we’d like generous benefits, free housing, and pocket money while we “integrate” over the next three generations. Work is optional, obviously.
Appreciate your tolerance in advance. After all, diversity is our strength!
Yours faithfully,
A Very Reasonable Christian

[Josh @Nephzi]

@realZacZook @whatever @TheOmniLiberal Haven’t seen a ton of Andrew but I’m pretty sure he’s not a marxist…

[Anonymous @YourAnonNews]

@elonmusk This is how everyone knows it’s fake. You chime in with stupid propaganda instead of trying to calm tensions. Keep lighting the wicks, but don’t be shocked when it all blows up in your face.

[MilkyArt @UltimateClint]

He is not against debate btw, he is against getting humiliated by people who are more knowledgeable than him. This anti debate shtick only started after Destiny repeatedly humiliated him.

[Josh @Nephzi]

@RobGrieves Just need to hear him talk to know he’s Aussie

[Swann Marcus @SwannMarcus89]

Extremely underrated Hasan Piker moment was when he went on a five minute rant about how the streets should run red with the blood of landlords and like five days later everyone found out his mom owns and manages commercial real estate

[ParkinScrotes @parkinscroat]

America having a rare chance to legitimately call themselves world champions at one of the sports they invented and bottling it is very funny.

[Klara @klara_sjo]

There will be no WW3.

They've abandoned numbered releases and switched to a live service model with seasonal events.

[Josh @Nephzi]

@TheOmniLiberal Sounds like a pretty defamatory tweet, maybe try and get some of that money spent on lawyers back, no doubt Hasan has plenty of wealth hoarded away

[Terry Flewers @terryflewers]

The reaction to Chelsea beating Wrexham has been genuinely bizarre. You’ve got professional pundits and fans openly calling for VAR to be scrapped, even though it intervened correctly on two occasions simply because it denied them the romantic outcome they wanted.

We scream for VAR when it makes huge mistakes, but when it gets decisions right and the team people wanted to win doesn’t, suddenly the system is the problem. That kind of selective outrage is pure madness.

[Riley @Ri_S_OB]

LeBron never did that

[Josh @Nephzi]

@rishab70113 @xevekiah I don’t need to be mauled by a bear to know picking a bear is obviously a horrible decision…

[Arthur MacWaters @ArthurMacwaters]

In LOTR, hobbits in the shire spent so long sheltered from evil that they don't even really believe it exists.

The west is like the shire.