burt macklin, fbi

the best damn agent the fbi had until I was framed for a crime I didn't commit: stealing the president's rubies

[Mariah Carey @MariahCarey]

Major Game of Thrones spoilers....
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[burt macklin, fbi @NGen52]

@XZACHMATHEWSX Wanna go to usd?

[burt macklin, fbi @NGen52]

Fully convinced I do not know anyone at OU anymore #5thyearproblems

[burt macklin, fbi @NGen52]

@g_p0w accurate representation of the 1 week period we tried to diet you down for the wedding . Moments after: reservations were made at @HellsKitchenID

[Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti]

[Impersonating Christopher Walken]
It's me, Christopher Walken.

[TWIZZLERS Twists @TWIZZLERS]

20 million retweets and we'll produce this script ourselves. https://t.co/ZCJJWpbuUJ

[burt macklin, fbi @NGen52]

The whole "smoking isn't cool" argument is made completely invalid by "Mad Men"

[burt macklin, fbi @NGen52]

Caputo is the best character in #Orangeisthenewblack. Convince me I'm wrong.

[burt macklin, fbi @NGen52]

Does anyone have any good recommendations for a TV series? Preferably funny or scary. I feel like I've seen everything 😞

[Hat @KyldishGambino]

So babies can breastfeed in public, but when I suck on my girls titty at Chili’s all hell breaks loose

[Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti]

I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of the Saw movies and then asked it to write a Saw movie of its own. Here is the first page.

[Pitch @pitchjokes]

new lacroix flavors!
-transported in a truck near bananas
-hint of hint of lime
-single skittle dissolved in water
-shy watermelon
-imagine like, a strawberry but with low battery

[gary from teen mom @garyfromteenmom]

all i wanna do is
*gunshots*
*click*
*cash register noise*
𝓼𝓾𝓯𝓯𝓮𝓻

[burt macklin, fbi @NGen52]

@garyfromteenmom @g_p0w

[gary from teen mom @garyfromteenmom]

maybe it’s maybelline maybe its a 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

[gary from teen mom @garyfromteenmom]

[truth or dare 2006]
Q1: whats ur favorite color
Q2: how many guys have u hugged

[burt macklin, fbi @NGen52]

After scrolling through Jim Carrey's Twitter, I am fully convinced Ace Venture 3 would be the darkest and unsettling film since "Se7en" https://t.co/qYEurIOL9T

[olivia @big_sachi]

Idc what y'all say or how much you say this is body positive.... This is unhealthy. It's out of line. Drag me. https://t.co/SyiVDqVXfR