Nick Aukerman

MSU Civil Engineering 2018; 10-1 #neverforget

[fool of a took @gaycryptic]

philly flipping pennsylvania to a blue state

[Jake Marsh @JakeMarsh18]

The newest member of the Hall of Fame, Derek Jeter, grew up in Kalamazoo, MI.

Kalamazoo was the Celery Capital of the World in the early decades of the last century.

1 stalk of celery from Walmart: $1.38
Jeter's career earnings: $266,230,000

Stalks Jeter could buy: 192,920,290

[Blake Griffin @blakegriffin23]

got ‘em

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@pmullll @xosarafina Only if I can drink with your dad

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@pmullll @xosarafina Uhhh excuse me? Where the hell is my invite?

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@pmullll @xosarafina Yo who’s that hottie in the last pic?

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@DeLeinaar I’ll um my kids haven’t caught up to me yet

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

So is it socially acceptable for a 23 year old to go trick or treating by himself? Asking for a friend

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

RIP to the Eastern Conference

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@pmullll Moby

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@alexdodger Jesus christ lol

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@andreabucholtz Sad but true

[Jimmy Tatro @JimmyTatro]

And then Jesus was all like, April Fools bitches! I’m not even dead!

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@xosarafina Oh yeah

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@xosarafina Thx for the invite

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

Did you even go to the IM if you didn't get surrounded by naked old guys in the locker room?

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@HaydenDurham20 Of course man! Replenishes those electrolytes n' such

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

I just got some of the most judgemental stares walking down the baby aisle, meanwhile these people don't realize I'm not shopping for my love child, I'm looking for some pedialyte for my hungover ass

[Nick Aukerman @Nick_Aukerman]

@alexdodger "Can I get some of these whores doe vrees, please?"