Sometimes male anger at ‘women getting special treatment’ reminds me of a gorilla experiment. One gorilla gets a banana every hour. The females next to him get one every four hours. Then someone decides to be fairer and gives the females a banana every two hours instead. The original gorilla? He flips out. He's still getting his banana every hour, but it feels like a loss because his advantage shrank. That's how a lot of men react to basic fairness for women: not as justice, but as theft.
My coworker used to take the long way home every night. Two extra bus stops, more walking, more money, more time. One day I asked her why she didn’t just take the shortcut alley behind our building.
She laughed and said, “Oh, because a guy followed me there once and told me he could ‘do whatever he wanted’ and no one would hear me scream.”
So now, every night, she calls a male friend and pretends she’s on the phone with her “boyfriend.” Sometimes she even laughs loudly and says things like, “Yeah, I’ll see you in five minutes, babe,” even when she’s completely alone.
Not because she wants attention.
Not because she’s dramatic.
Because sounding “taken” and “protected” is safer than sounding like a woman by herself.
Men cannot even begin to understand the calculations women make every day just to get home alive.
Women are cautious of men as a pattern.
Men are offended by women as a reaction.
I once heard a girl say she crosses the street at night when she sees a man walking behind her. A guy replied, “That’s sexist. Not all men are dangerous.”
But that same guy will say he’d “lose his mind” if his daughter walked home alone at 2AM.
That’s the difference.
Women adjust their behavior because of what might happen.
Men get upset because of how that adjustment makes them feel.
One side is responding to risk.
The other is responding to ego.
It’s not “I hate you personally.”
It’s “the system has proven I need to be careful.”
And somehow that always turns into, “Why are you attacking me?”
The irony writes itself.
When skinny people eat nothing but junk food we accept genetics are far more important than diet, but when overweight people are constantly dieting, people can't accept that for some reason. They must be eating in secret or something
<There is no next stop>
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