EmilyTheStrange

Girl, Painter, Underachiever, daily toker... i love music, i hate politics, and i would save an animal before a person #idowhatiwant

[Seattle Seahawks @Seahawks]

We're heading to the Divisional Round.

See you next weekend @AtlantaFalcons.

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

It's midnight and I'm stoned and horny... And my effing gf won't wake up.... and the toys have no batteries. Ugh!

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

Don't get my hopes up. https://t.co/UzGx1FGPnk

[thoughts @thegoatcircle]

A person who sleeps too much, sits too much and isn't physically active enough is more than 4 times as likely to die early.

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

I just need sex and cuddles. Is that really too much to ask for??

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

Hopefully the @NFL will do something about the intentional hit to @DarrenSproles. Dude got speared before he even had the ball.

[Brian J. Haddad @BrianJHaddad]

I'll start a gofundme for a bounty on Everett #FlyEaglesFly https://t.co/BBa6rh5UZF

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

United Airlines charging for the carry on compartment, is like getting in a taxi and being charged to use the cup holder.

[Ariane @AReinaPhoto]

This doesn't apply to 2016 cuz there are dudes contouring like pros and eyebrows definitely on fleek so... 😆 https://t.co/fVLar7I1LO

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

Sickening. https://t.co/NcBNjIwTYt

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

Emily's Abortion Clinic and Pizza Palace. Your loss is our sauce, how may I help you today?

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

It's only December 9th and I'm ready to hang myself by the Christmas lights already....

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

I have a bad habit of getting caught doing the "suck it" motion behind my boss's back.

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

Tweets are really just brain farts.

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

I went to work in the same makeup I wore yesterday, artistically smudged to show how much I don't give a fuck about any of you.

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

Matt Lauer and Al Roker look like a past and present version of Sherlock Holmes.
Al with a brown vintage look, and Matt in a blue modern.

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

If I just keep my sunglasses on, nobody can see me.

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

Would anybody really notice if I went to work in what I slept in?

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

I get woken up from naps with gravity bong hits and candy.

[EmilyTheStrange @NinjaaSquirell]

I bought a bag of $80 dog food and then rinsed off my paper plate.. It's all about priorities.