Grumpy Jerry

#1 Mouse that can Tweet. Being as funny as the Average Mouse can be. A mouse on a mission to find the piece of cheese. Follow with me to find the Cheese.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

#DescribeYourselfInThreeWordsEightLetters very funny

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Anything is possible?

False. You can't ride a pigeon to school.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Nothing brightens my day more than the sun.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Knock Knock"

"Who's there?"

"Boo."

"I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away."

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Why does Piglet smell?

Because he plays with Pooh.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Three hispanic men pull into a suburban neighborhood.

They pick up their friend and go see a movie.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Squirrels don't know the root of x and they seem to be doing fine

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

You know it's dark outside when you look outside and it's dark.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

I hate you.
We break up.
You call me.
I still hate you so stop calling me.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

What's worse than failing an exam?

Falling down a flight of stairs.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Why was the little boy crying by the playground?

A bird took a shit on his head.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

A penguin walks into a bar...

The bartender says, "So what will it be this time?" The penguin doesn't answer because it's a penguin.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Why couldn't Tommy pick up the bunny?

Because the bunny was schizophrenic and Tommy wasn't real.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

My maturity level depends on who I'm with.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Hate it when I look horrible in a group photo and the person that looks good refuses to delete it.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Why do people ask “What the hell were you thinking?” Obviously I was thinking I was going to get away with it and not have to explain it.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

If Plan A doesn’t work, the alphabet has 25 more letters. Keep calm.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

I like to stop the microwave with one second to go; it makes me feel like a bomb defusal expert.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Sorry, I'm not tall enough to ride your emotional roller-coaster.

[Grumpy Jerry @NotFunnyJerry]

Do I know any jokes about Sodium Hypobromite? NaBrO