So i started dating this guy who's "really into birds." Thought that meant he had a bird feeder or whatever. Showed up to his place for the first time. This man has SEVEN parrots. Seven. They all talk. They all have opinions. One of them heckled me during dinner. Called me "the new one" in a British accent for some reason. My boyfriend thinks it's charming. I'm being bullied by a bird named Gerald. Tried to have a serious conversation with my boyfriend last night and Gerald kept interrupting with "IRRELEVANT" in that same British accent. The other birds think Gerald is hilarious. They're learning from him. I'm outnumbered. My boyfriend proposed last week. Gerald said "she'll say no." I said yes out of spite. Gerald has been sulking for three days.
After 3 months of hard work, @bigtarkin and I would like to showcase Tarkov: Lambda — a Counter-Strike derivative modification set in #EscapeFromTarkov
> Fly to Rotterdam for Twitchcon on Thursday
> Spend two days binge drinking in dirty Dutch pubs
> Remember I have huge tournament Saturday morning
> Wake up hungover with 3 hours sleep to play
> Vomit in hotel bathroom, then Uber to event
> Get 1st Place in whole Twitch Rivals (€30,000 for our team)
> Return to dirty Dutch pubs and spend €1000 on drinks next two days.
Events like this are what make life worth living, I really enjoyed meeting everyone, both new and old faces, and can't wait to do so again so thank you!!!
P.S. Dutch beer is WEAK.
Yeah, con orgies are a real thing.
Last time I went to one someone jumped up and said "HOLY SHIT IS THAT IMMY BISOU?!" and then all the girls screamed and asked me to sign their boobs and then everyone clapped at the end.