Not Luke Blase

I am not Luke Blase.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

I really like Colin Firth. Way better than Colin Thecond.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

And when God saw that the Atlantans built a giant chicken up to the heavens, he confused their roadways.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

Michael Keaton deciding which snack to eat on the plane: "Let's get nuts."

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

Some people think think that they can drive a car without air in the tires. But flattery will get you nowhere.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

If you think the "Swifties" are bad, just wait until you find out about Juggalos.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

The existence of "Mary Poppins" (1964) and "Mary Poppins Returns" (2018) implies the existence of "Mary Poppins Forever" and "Mary Poppins & Robin".

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

And Peter said, "Lord, how many times must we repeat the bridge? Is it seven times?"
And he said unto him, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven."

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

I really appreciate the word “many.” It means a lot.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

"Ack-ack-ack-ack-ack" - Billy Joel

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

The year is 2035. With the release of Speak Now: Taylor's Version: Taylor's Version, Taylor Swift is officially halfway through re-re-releasing her albums. The Swifties have successfully taken up permanent occupation of the Capitol Building. "All Too Well" is now 48 minutes long.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

Yeah, but it's a moist heat.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

Wet squelching outside the Tastee Freeze.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

Fried okra are just southern calamari.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

Allman Brothers Band are better than Lynyrd Skynyrd.

I said what I said.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

There's no way chicken tenders are the most efficient possible means of delivering Zax sauce to one's mouth.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

@StephenShutters You're a madman! I'm worried your genius won't be appreciated in your time.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

Calzones are Italian quesadillas. Change my mind.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

It just occurred to me that if Smashing Pumpkins were a British band, it would just mean really great pumpkins.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

I think the reason so many people were disappointed in The Batman is because, unlike Batman & Robin, The Batman has zero gorilla suits, zero Batnipples, and zero Coolio cameos.

[Not Luke Blase @NotLukeBlase]

And they will know you are my disciples by how poorly you tip your servers.